Fairy Guts, Rabbit Depression, and Grade School Rejection

My friends would describe me as an avid lover and collector of
books. And of course they are right. I love books. I love the smell of
vintage leather bound books, the crackling sound a new book makes when
opened for the first time, and cuddling up under a warm blankey (yes, I
STILL call it that), with a warm cup of java and book in hand.

Ok, so far I still sound quite normal. Just keep reading and I
promise that thought will be long gone by the time we are finished
here. Yes, it's true, I love books, but not just any books. I have a
very twisted and quite dysfunctional (hey we can be honest, right?)
addiction for strange books.

So what exactly do I mean by strange? Well….let me explain. Over the
years I have read many "normal" books. By normal I mean your everyday
book turned lifetime movie type deal. Pretty basic, same story about
some woman who has an alcohol addiction and turns her life
around…bla,bla,bla….happy ending. I'm not knocking these books, I've
just acquired a fresh taste for the ever so odd.

The addiction began by accident. A friend of mine stopped by one day
and told me about a new read of hers. I am pretty sure once I heard the
word fairies I stopped listening as I have never really gotten into
fantasy reads. But just as my selective hearing issue completely voided
out any words rambling from her lips, one got through and caught my
attention. SPLAT! Yes, thats the word, really! You do remember we were
veering away from normal, right?

Moving on….

So yes, she said "SPLAT!", and smacked her hands together loudly.
(Maybe she noticed I had tuned her out like 10 minutes ago.) "Splat" I
said, wondering what the heck she was rambling about. "Yes, the
fairies". What??? I said.."The fairies went splat"? Yep, I was so
bused. She totally knew I was not listening, well at least not until
the whole splat and clap thingy.

The book, from the conversation I am describing, is none other than
Lady Cottingtons Pressed Fairy book. This amazing book, based on looks,
comes off as some sort of beautiful fairy fantasy storybook. The book
is large and somewhat vintage/classic looking. The beginning starts off
with a hand written letter from Lady Cottington in her elder years,
addressed to an old friend named Madge. I don't want to give any of the
story away but I feel a moral need to tell anyone who might feel faint
at the sight of artistically painted fairy guts, that this may not be
the book for them. As for me, it's what hooked me into such an
addiction and love for strange, yet brilliant books.

As my love for bizarre reads erupted into a full blown addiction I
found other remarkably abnormal books that continued to feed the need.
Another one of my favorite finds was a book called Bunny Suicides.
Definitely not for those offended easily or that has ever had to deal
with the trauma of such an event in real life. Bunny Suicides is a
quite unusual book about, well…..a bunny. And as Adam Buxton put it,
"The most moving account of rabbit related depression I can recall
reading". The illustrations in this book depict a rabbit on a mission
to retire himself from this world. Sounds a little creepy, oh but can
you image the look on your guests face when they plop-a-spot on the the
pot and find this little gem amongst your bathroom reading materials.
Priceless. Buy it! It's a must have.

Alright, let's stray from granny-murdered fairies and bunny deaths.
If you feel you need to relate more to a book to be interested, then
this one's for you…..

The other day while book browsing at a large book distributor I
prefer not to name as who knows what the legal ramifications these
days, I caught sight of a definite keeper. The fun and lively pink
cover pulled me in by my boot straps and page by page of hysterically
funny cartoon illustrations, forced my pocketbook to once again sink
lower and lower due to my strange and unusual addiction for the strange
and unusual.

Angry Little Girls in Love by Lela Lee is magnificent! Each page is
filled with some cartoon girl who is (no surprise here) upset with a
boy. Her witty rejection towards him will leave you in tears laughing
through the entire book. Of course those of us who remember what it
felt like when we called little Johnny Robert's in 3rd grade and
confessed our love by singing "I just called to say I love you", only
to end up the laughing stock of 3rd, 4th……ok maybe even 5th and 6th
grade, will love to read this book just to feel empowered by the
turning of the tables.

So even if you are not an avid enthusiast of strange and 
dysfunctional reading materials, I hope you rethink what exactly makes
a book good and take a walk on the wild side. Jump in! The waters
anything but warm.