Famous People Sell Magazines

We’re always looking to sell more copies of this magazine, and it’s common knowledge that the fastest way to a fickle consumer’s wallet is to have a scantily clad starlet with come-hither eyes gazing out from your cover. We at GOOD thought we were better than that, but all is changed now. Sort of. We wanted Jessica Alba in a bikini; we got Danny DeVito on a Segway.

BIG THINKER:

Danny DeVito

I have a Segway but it’s not as nice as this one. It’s a great idea—to get you around for fun, and now they’ve evolved to where you lean to turn. The one I have you have to turn the handles. This one is more fluid, it’s more like what it should have been in the first place. They’re really good for sightseeing, going around in the country. But it’s not like riding a bicycle because there’s no exercise: you’re just standing there. If they could find a way to make it exercise, that would be even better.