Newt-o Hablo Espanol
There is a rumor that Penelope Cruz learns the lines for her English movies phonetically. She is much better than Newt Gingrich reading his Spanish phonetically. Also, she is not apologizing for calling Spanish "the language of the ghetto," which probably helps with the goodwill and forgiving of errors..
Welcome Home Boys (And Girl)
Iran releases British hostages as "a favor to England." Rest assured that they have not been secretly hypnotized to become killing machines when they get home, that only happens in movies. At least the men got nice suits out the deal. The woman... not so much..