Brace yourself. You might want to sit down for this, especially if you're stoned out of your mind, which you kind of seem like you are. (I can totally tell; everyone knows, actually.)

Today is basically the craziest day of all time.

Sure, there are only 365 days in a year, and every decade or so something newsworthy happens on each of them, but few days rival April 20. From tragic shootings to birthdays of evil world leaders to the advent of safe-to-drink milk, the day of festivity for pot aficionados the world over is a bizarre mix of horror, humor, and history.

It's also worth mentioning that in the alternate universe of the Terminator series, it's over the course of April 19 to April 21, 2011, that Skynet is implemented and the machines take over. So enjoy what time we have left and avoid cops in search of Sarah Connor.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

Gulf oil spill

The Deepwater Horizon rig explodes. Eleven workers die. Oil spews into the gulf for months.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

Columbine massacre

Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold kill 13 people at Columbine High School in Colorado. They also injure 24 people and kill themselves.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

Moon landing

Apollo 16 lands on the moon. Not the first time we've been there, but still really impressive.

Photo courtesy of NASA

Bay of Pigs

The sound of movies

Vitaphone, a process by which sound is added to film, is announced by Western Electric and Warner Bros.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

New stadium day

Baseball season opens at the brand new Tiger Stadium in Detroit, Michigan, and Fenway Park in Boston, Massachusetts. Four years later, Chicago's Wrigley Field hosts its first game; for the next century, a lone dark cloud looms over the outfield every day.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

Hitler's b-day

Birthday of Adolf Hitler. Fifty years later, Nazi Germany celebrates his birthday as a national holiday. In some bitter irony, it was on this date in 1657 that freedom of religion was granted to Jews living in New York (which was at the time called New Amsterdam).

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

Pasteurize this!

Louis Pasteur and Claude Bernard test pasteurization. Bernard laments the lopsided nomenclature.

Photos courtesy of Wikimedia Commons

Old Ironsides

Oliver Cromwell, the Commonwealth-establishing English Civil War hero with a regicidal dictatorial streak, dismantles the "Rump Parliament" that he helped found after overthrowing and killing Charles I.

Painting courtesy of Wikimedia Commons