Why Mayonnaise Matters in the Gentrification Debate

Elizabeth Valleau’s artisanal mayo shop has become the poster child for urban change.

Illustration by Tom Eichacker

Earlier this year, Saturday Night Live aired a sketch dubbed “Corner Boys of Bushwick, Brooklyn,” depicting a seemingly stylized and magnified version of hipster-fueled gentrification. In it, Kevin Hart, Jay Pharoah, and Keenan Thompson play three apparent tough guys, presented as emblematic of the neighborhood’s hardscrabble and working class history, who intercut their gruff dialogue with descriptions of now-yuppified lives; endless brunches, gluten fears, and dog walking businesses. A somewhat wincing depiction of the identity crisis impacting a neighborhood flooded by comparatively affluent and outwardly twee newcomers, the piece struck a chord with those viewing similar trends worldwide.

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Portlandia: We Put Birds on Things

Portland, "a city where young people go to retire," is the star of a new series on IFC. Will any car-driving carnivores be watching?

When the media flier for the Portland premiere of IFC’s new sketch comedy show Portlandia promised red carpet arrivals with “celebrity guests,” I’ll admit that I felt a twinge of giddy curiosity at the thought of Tinseltown glitz descending momentarily upon our drizzly city. Real celebrities? In Portland? The idea boggled the mind. So when I arrived outside the charmingly dilapidated Hollywood Theater on Friday evening and found no red carpet in sight, I assumed I’d missed the glamorous festivities. It was only after I waded through the tide of thrilled indie-chic Portlanders and ventured to the media room that I realized my mistake. In this case, “red carpet” referred to the actual worn carpeting of the room where local media members huddled excitedly around Carrie Brownstein, one of the show’s two stars and the only celebrity present.

Of course, this experience was perfectly in keeping with the theme of the show itself: Portlandia lovingly satirizes the hyper-liberal, defiantly insular culture of the Rose City. As Brownstein and fellow star Fred Armisen (of Saturday Night Live fame) see things, Portland isn’t so much a city as it is an unusually large commune, packed with idealists whose zeal for sustainability is matched only by their unparalleled ability to slack off. (As Armisen puts it in the show’s first few minutes, “Portland is a city where young people go to retire.”) Portlandias citizens are broadminded and tolerant only until someone breaks one of the community’s innumerable unwritten rules, at which point they transform into avenging furies of liberal outrage. In one hilarious sketch, Armisen and Brownstein reach DEFCON 5 after seeing a dog tied up outside a restaurant, its owner missing; “Who puts their dog on a pole like a stripper?” shrieks Brownstein. So you’re damn right Portland doesn’t do red carpets: haven’t you heard how the production of red dye damages lemur habitats in Madagascar? You haven’t? What’s wrong with you?

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Al Gore's "Gonna Start Acting Crazy"

I have to admit that I'm no real fan of NBC's "Green Week." (That conscious marginalization of "The Environment" into discreet chunks of pithy...

I have to admit that I'm no real fan of NBC's "Green Week." (That conscious marginalization of "The Environment" into discreet chunks of pithy content that's so easily forgotten when the block ends doesn't do a lot to help, in my opinion.) And, as much as I love the guy and all he's done, I have to further admit that I haven't paid a lot of attention to Al Gore recently. But credit where credit's due: He was hilarious with Seth Meyers on SNL's Weekend Update last week. Gore's backup plan if politicians don't start taking climate change seriously: "I'm gonna start acting crazy." He even hits "Green Week" for the reasons that have me rolling my eyes: "I know the score. Once a year, during Green Week, NBC calls up Al Gore to come on TV and talk about the Environment." And yet, somehow, this Weekend Update almost makes the whole "Green Week" thing worthwhile.