Most of us walk around following unwritten rules even if we’re not aware of it. Maybe it’s a common social custom we mistakenly assume everyone else cares about. Perhaps it’s an office policy that doesn’t technically exist. But every so often you meet someone who seems to follow their own code, causing you to rethink what’s obligatory and what’s optional.
That’s the basic premise of a recent online thread where someone asked the intriguing question, “What’s something you always assumed was mandatory in life—until you met someone who just…didn’t do it?” The responses seem to tackle every aspect of life, from work to casual conversation.
People thought these things were mandatory until they saw the light
Here are some of the top Reddit comments:
“Sharing a bed and a room with your partner (if you have a partner). I have a friend who lives with her boyfriend, but they each have their own bedroom (and, therefore, separate beds). Turns out it’s not just a silly Hollywood trope from the 1950s.”
“I always assumed people needed coffee every morning until I met someone who never drank it and seemed perfectly fine.”
“Having a house or apartment that you return to in the same place every day. I have some friends who are essentially nomadic. They travel all over the country working events and have no house aside from the camper they live in. I think I never really pictured this as a possible lifestyle before this. I just assumed that people would like, leave their real house for a few months at a time and then come back, but nope. Their camper is their full time house and they just move it every 2 months or so. Blew my mind a bit.”
“Not ‘mandatory’ but listening to music. Met someone when asked what they like to listen to replied, ‘I’m not really into music.’ I pressed the issue because I couldn’t believe it. Same response.”
“Only celebrating yourself on your birthday. Had a friend who took off work on the same day each year, just to celebrate another year, it wasn’t his birthday. He said his birthday is full of people wanting to celebrate with him, and he loved that, but this chosen day was his day just for himself. I started doing the same shortly after, my special day is the first day of spring where the weather hits 75 or higher. I’ll be kayaking at the lake.”
“Several people focused on the pressure to finish something you started. “Quitting an event that sucks rather than sticking it out because you’ve already paid for it is maximum freedom,” one person wrote. Someone gave an example in reply: “Walking out of the cinema when the movie is shit.” Another added, “Putting a book down when you aren’t enjoying it. Going to bed half way through a crap tv show.”
Do you owe an explanation for how you use PTO?
One of the top replies focuses on the use of paid time off (PTO). “I used to give my bosses full reasons about why I was requesting PTO or calling in sick,” someone wrote. “Or if I didn’t want to attend an event I felt like I needed to have an excuse why I didn’t or couldn’t go, then I met a coworker who just didn’t do that. She would call out sick with the reason ‘I won’t be in today’ and that’s it.” (This person also took the same less-is-more approach in their social life: “She declined coming to a dinner I was hosting by just saying ‘I won’t make the event.’ Which is 1000% fine by me. It just blew my mind, and I love it.”)
Lots of other users used the PTO example as possible red flag for pushy bosses. “I had a great boss who taught me a lot about setting boundaries and expectations,” someone added. “The first time I called in sick, I was about to explain why I couldn’t come in and she just cut me off: ‘Just tell me you won’t be in today. That’s all you need to tell me, and that’s all you need to tell anybody.’”
This is a particularly relevant topic, given that the “PTO reasoning” subject went viral in 2025, with The Huffington Post even inquiring with career coach Keni Dominguez. “How you choose to spend your vacation or paid time off (PTO) is your choice and does not require an explanation,” she said.
