Virtues such as compassion, patience and self-control may be beneficial not only for others but also for oneself, according to new research my team and I published in the Journal of Personality in December 2025.

Philosophers from Aristotle to al-Fārābī, a 10th-century scholar in what is now Iraq, have argued that virtue is vital for well-being. Yet others, such as Thomas Hobbes and Friedrich Nietzsche, have argued the opposite: Virtue offers no benefit to oneself and is good only for others. This second theory has inspired lots of research in contemporary psychology, which often sees morality and self-interest as fundamentally opposed.

Many studies have found that generosity is associated with happiness, and that encouraging people to practice kindness increases their well-being. But other virtues seem less enjoyable.

For example, a compassionate person wants to alleviate suffering or misfortune, but that requires there be suffering or misfortune. Patience is possible only when something irritating or difficult is happening. And self-control involves forgoing one’s desires or persisting with something difficult.

Psychology, Philosophy, Ethics, Self-control, Compassion, Patience, Quick reads, Virtue, New research, Personal well-being, Research Brief, Character virtue
Volunteers who drive homeless people to shelters talk with a person from Ukraine in Berlin on Jan. 7, 2026. Michael Ukas/dpa/picture alliance via Getty Images

Could these kinds of virtues really be good for you?

My colleagues and I investigated this question in two studies, using two different methods to zoom in on specific moments in people’s daily lives. Our goal was to assess the degree to which, in those moments, they were compassionate, patient and self-controlled. We also assessed their level of well-being: how pleasant or unpleasant they felt, and whether they found their activities meaningful.

One study, with adolescents, used the experience sampling method, in which people answer questions at random intervals throughout the day. The other, studying adults, used the day reconstruction method, in which people answer questions about the previous day. All told, we examined 43,164 moments from 1,218 people.

During situations that offer opportunities to act with compassion, patience and self-control – encountering someone in need, for example, or dealing with a difficult person – people tend to experience more unpleasant feelings and less pleasant ones than in other situations. However, we found that exercising these three virtues seems to help people cope. People who are habitually more compassionate, patient and self-controlled tend to experience better well-being. And when people display more compassion, patience and self-control than usual, they tend to feel better than they usually do.

In short, our results contradicted the theory that virtue is good for others and bad for the self. They were consistent with the theory that virtue promotes well-being.

Why it matters

These studies tested the predictions of two venerable, highly influential theories about the relationship between morality and well-being. In doing so, they offered new insights into one of the most fundamental questions debated in philosophy, psychology and everyday life.

Moreover, in the scientific study of morality, lots of research has examined how people form moral judgments and how outside forces shape a person’s moral behavior. Yet some researchers have argued that this should be complemented by research on moral traits and how these are integrated into the whole person. By focusing on traits such as patience, compassion and self-control, and their roles in people’s daily lives, our studies contribute to the emerging science of virtue.

What still isn’t known

One open question for future research is whether virtues such as compassion, patience and self-control are associated with better well-being only under certain conditions. For example, perhaps things look different depending on one’s stage of life or in different parts of the world.

Our studies were not randomized experiments. It is possible that the associations we observed are explained by another factor – something that increases well-being while simultaneously increasing compassion, patience and self-control. Or maybe well-being affects virtue, instead of the other way around. Future research could help clarify the causal relationships.

One particularly interesting possibility is that there might be a “virtuous cycle”: Perhaps virtue tends to promote well-being – and well-being, in turn, tends to promote virtue. If so, it would be extremely valuable to learn how to help people kick-start that cycle.

This article originally appeared on The Conversation. You can read it here.

  • Overpackers love this simple ‘5-4-3-2-1’ packing rule that makes travel way easier
    An obvious overpack for travel.Photo credit: Canva
    ,

    Overpackers love this simple ‘5-4-3-2-1’ packing rule that makes travel way easier

    When it comes to travel, packing efficiently is a skill acquired through experience. Lifestyle and content creator Alison Lumbatis shares a helpful 5-4-3-2-1 method designed to take the stress out of packing for both seasoned travelers and first-timers. Trying to pack light while still remembering everything you need can feel a little daunting. A simple…

    When it comes to travel, packing efficiently is a skill acquired through experience. Lifestyle and content creator Alison Lumbatis shares a helpful 5-4-3-2-1 method designed to take the stress out of packing for both seasoned travelers and first-timers.

    Trying to pack light while still remembering everything you need can feel a little daunting. A simple trick is knowing exactly what’s necessary, making your bag lighter and more practical.

    @alisonlumbatis

    Calling all overpackers—this one’s for you! ✈️🧳 The 5-4-3-2-1 packing method is one of my favorites because it’s totally customizable. Prefer dresses? Swap a top and bottom for a dress. Love skirts? Sub them in for pants! These pieces should last you 1-2 weeks, depending on your access to laundry. 🔗’s to everything in bio! #outfitformulas #packinglight #styleconfidence #wardrobemadeeasy #travelcapsule #dailyoutfits #closetconfidence #vacationstyle #fashionover40 #smartstyle

    ♬ original sound – Alison Lumbatis

    Putting The ‘5-4-3-2-1 Packing Method’ Into Action

    In her trending TikTok post, Lumbatis shares a packing system she claims to be “as easy as it sounds.” Here are the basics of the 5-4-3-2-1 packing method:

    • 5 TOPS
    • 4 BOTTOMS
    • 3 SHOES
    • 2 LAYERS
    • 1 MISCELLANEOUS

    Lumbatis explains, “So all you got to do is pick out 5 tops, 4 coordinating bottoms, 3 pairs of shoes, 2 layering pieces, and 1 of anything else. Like a dress, pajamas, a hat, a belt, or any other accessories that you might need. And then of course pack as many undergarments and toiletries as you need.”

    The strategy isn’t just about simplifying and maximizing the number of items you bring on a trip. It’s also about function. “The key is to pick versatile pieces that can mix and match so you can pair them up for whatever activities you have planned for your trip.”

    minimalism, versatile pieces, functionality, packing
    Packing the necessary items
    Photo credit Canva

    Taking Pictures Can Help Plan Ahead

    Another helpful step is taking photos of your outfits to remember how everything fits together. Lumbatis offers, “You can even take pictures of the outfits with you wearing them or flat lays of the pieces and keep them on your phone or in your Notes App — So you can refer back to it on your trip.”

    Is the 5-4-3-2-1 packing method effective? These were some of the thoughts in the comments from readers hopeful to put the plan into action:

    “Great tip for me. Hate packing and never wear all the clothes I bring.”

    “Heading to Japan and I was just going to my closet to put it together. I overpack so this is sooo helpful.”

    “I’m dreading how to not over pack for such a variety of occasions, heat, and limited washing facilities. Ugh.”

    “I struggle with under packing so this is super helpful!”

    travel, adventure, alleviate stress, preparation
    Soaking up the adventure.
    Photo credit Canva

    The Science Behind Good Preparation

    Traveling is a great way to alleviate the stress and burdens of our daily lives. A 2025 study in Springer Nature Link showed travel helped people improve their long-term resilience by creating positive emotions while ecouraging self reflection. National Geographic found the benefits of travel begin even before the trip begins.

    However, preparation can have a powerful effect on the simple stresses a person might acquire during traveling. A 2025 study revealed that planning reduced anxiety and helped people prepare for delays or unexpected changes. Research in 2025 reported by AP News found that even making a simple checklist reduced anxiety and helped make for smoother trips.

    Lumbatis claims, “If you struggle with overpacking and want to create a great capsule wardrobe packing list, you’ve got to try this method.”

    People hope that traveling will relieve stress more than generate it. The 5-4-3-2-1 packing method offers a clear and simple way to pack just what you need. Careful preparation helps prevent last-minute chaos and produces a more enjoyable trip. Hopefully, this method can help you spend less time worrying and more time soaking in the adventure.

    Watch this YouTube video on incredible vacation destinations to inspire your next trip:

  • Video of 3rd grade classroom’s poetic stuffed animals display is bringing people to tears
    A cute pile of stuffed animals.Photo credit: Canva
    ,

    Video of 3rd grade classroom’s poetic stuffed animals display is bringing people to tears

    When 3rd-grade teacher Kelsie Lynn posted a video of her classroom during recess, these stuffed animals on display brought people near tears. The video struck a powerful chord of nostalgia, landing thousands of plays. In her post, she shares that the magic of childhood can come alive through stuffed animals in a classroom. This call…

    When 3rd-grade teacher Kelsie Lynn posted a video of her classroom during recess, these stuffed animals on display brought people near tears. The video struck a powerful chord of nostalgia, landing thousands of plays.

    In her post, she shares that the magic of childhood can come alive through stuffed animals in a classroom. This call to happy memories inspired heartwarming reactions and a powerful sense of connection among viewers.

    A Room Of ‘Stuffies’

    After Kelsie Lynn gave the children an opportunity to vote for a class reward, they chose to bring their ‘stuffies,’ stuffed animals. As the TikTok video moves through the classroom, the stuffies sit respectfully in chairs awaiting students to return from recess.

    In an interview with People, Lynn explained, “They all chose to put their stuffies in their seats up to their desk as if they were working. It was so cute and innocent and just really reminded me how little third graders still are.”

    Lynn used the viral post to highlight the importance of childhood. She describes the special role treasured toys and a safe, inviting classroom can play. “These moments are not just about fun; they are essential in nurturing emotional connections and fostering a sense of community within the classroom. By allowing students to express themselves through their cherished toys, teachers create a welcoming environment where children feel valued and heard.”

    empathy, social connection, grandma, prosocial behavior
    Heartwarming, nostalgic moment for grandma.
    Photo credit Canva

    Classroom Video Stirs Nostalgic Emotions

    The simple classroom video of stuffed animals struck a surprisingly emotional chord. These are some of the thoughts from the comments:

    “Awww each one is waiting patiently for their person to come back. Love how some of them look a little love worn.”

    “I could cry this is so wholesome”

    “As a father this hits hard beyond words take a look at that room the innocence of every child telling us a little story about each and every one of them.”

    “This is the sweetest thing I’ve seen all month!”

    “i wish i was allowed to do this. my mom use to say she had to pry stitch out my hands till i was 4.”

    “Me at 31 watching this with my stuffy”

    “All 3 of my daughters are in elementary school and I can confirm each one of those stuffies means the world to each of them. Sometimes I have to stop and remind myself they’re still so little”

    children, happy moments, inspired, community
    Mom watches a child chew happily on a toy.
    Photo credit Canva

    The Science Behind Nostalgia

    Nostalgia is the warm feeling you get when remembering happy moments from the past. It can change how people treat others and invoke more empathy. A 2022 study in the National Library of Medicine found that nostalgia helps people feel more hopeful and inspired while adding meaning to their lives.

    Science suggests that people usually remember emotional moments more strongly than ordinary ones. A 2025 journal in Nature reports that these intense emotions allow the brain to connect different systems together, making memories easier to remember.

    love, emotional connection, friendship, cute content

    Social Media Loves A Happy Memory

    When people feel moved or touched by a post, it creates warm emotional reactions. Those feelings help explain why cute content becomes so popular on social media. A 2023 study in Frontiers created new ways to measure what makes content cute. They found posts that feel “kama muta,” moved by love, create the strongest reaction, increasing connection and virality.

    Seeing a classroom of stuffed animals during recess reminds viewers of simpler moments when beloved toys felt like a best friend. That glimpse of nostalgia mixed with the sweetness of 3rd graders creates an emotional connection people can’t help but share. The video resonates so strongly because it taps into something we recognize immediately: comfort and love.

    Here’s a fun video looking back at some nostalgic childhood moments:

  • A woman complained to her upstairs neighbor about  a strange noise in the middle of the night. His wholesome response was perfect.
    A woman reads a note from her neighborPhoto credit: Canva

    She had never actually met the man who lived above her. She knew him only as the source of the noise coming through her ceiling at 12:30 in the morning, the night after Super Bowl LIX. She pulled herself out of bed, went upstairs, and asked him through his Ring camera to please turn it down. He was polite. She went back to sleep.

    The next morning, there was a bottle of wine outside her door.

    The woman, who goes by u/operarose on Reddit, posted the photo to r/MadeMeSmile , and it pulled in 84,000 upvotes, as Newsweek reported. The caption was simple: “Had to get out of bed and go ask the upstairs neighbor (whom I’ve never actually met) to turn it down at about 12:30 am this morning. Found this outside my door when I woke up.”

    Attached to the bottle was a handwritten note. “I got too carried away watching recaps from the Superbowl and I didn’t realize how loud my TV was,” it read. “I’m so sorry for not being considerate with the volume. In positive news, the cookies you made for Christmas were amazing. Please allow me to return the favor.”

    That last part is what made the story. He already knew who she was. She’d baked Christmas cookies and apparently given some to neighbors she’d never formally met. He’d received them, remembered, and now here he was, months later, referencing them in an apology note attached to a bottle of wine.

    neighbors, kindness, apology, community, apartment living
    Plate of holiday cookies. Image source: Canva

    She reported back in the comments that the wine was good. “Never had this brand before, but I definitely recommend it,” she wrote.

    Etiquette expert Jo Hayes told Newsweek the neighbor had essentially done everything right. “A clear, sincere apology is necessary, and he did exactly this. Plus a kind word about the Christmas cookies. Plus a gift, as a token gesture of said apology, is the icing on the cake. This would have flooded the downstairs neighbor with warm fuzzies.”

    The comments filled with people who seemed almost relieved. “It’s insane just how hard it is to find people who can just be considerate and move on,” one user wrote. “Congratulations to both of you for spontaneously demonstrating how to be an adult,” said another. “This is how you neighbor,” someone summed up simply.

    The whole exchange took about two minutes of awkwardness and produced something neither of them had before the night started: a neighbor they actually know.

    This article originally appeared earlier this year.

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