Elle Magazine held its 25th Women in Hollywood event this month in Los Angeles. Those honored on the night included Shonda Rhimes, Sarah Paulson, Keira Knightley, Angela Bassett, and Lady Gaga.
Never one to shy away from making a loud fashion statement, Gaga shocked fellow attendees and the press by appearing on the red carpet wearing an oversized Marc Jacobs suit and her hair in a low bun.
But Gaga’s look wasn’t just for shock value. During her acceptance speech, she said her fashion choice was a statement on the commoditization of female bodies in Hollywood.
So, after trying 10 or so dresses, with a sad feeling in my heart, that all that would matter was what I wore to this red carpet, I saw an oversized Marc Jacobs suit buried quietly in the corner. I put it on to a resounding view of eyes glaring at me in confusion. But the Rodarte was so beautiful! one said. But the Raf Simons for Calvin Klein was so stunning on you! said another. But what about the Brandon Maxwell? What about the Dior? Lots of questions. They were all dresses.
This was an oversized men’s suit made for a woman. Not a gown. And then I began to cry. In this suit, I felt like me today. In this suit, I felt the truth of who I am well up in my gut. And then wondering what I wanted to say tonight become very clear to me.
As a sexual assault survivor by someone in the entertainment industry, as a woman who is still not brave enough to say his name, as a woman who lives with chronic pain, as a woman who was conditioned at a very young age to listen to what men told me to do, I decided today I wanted to take the power back. Today I wear the pants.
She also bravely recounted being sexually assaulted by a powerful man in the entertainment industry.
After I was assaulted when I was 19 I changed forever. Part of me shut down for many years. I didn’t tell anyone. I avoided it myself. And felt shame even still today standing in front of you. I feel shame for what happened to me. I still have days where I feel like it was my fault. After I shared what happened to me with very powerful men in this industry, nobody helped me. No one offered my guidance or a helping hand to lead me to a place where I felt justice, they didn’t even point me in the direction of the mental health assistance I was in dire need of.
So now she feels it’s her obligation to help those who have been abused or suffer from mental disorders to get the help they need.
It is my personal dream that there would be a mental health expert teacher or therapist in every school in this nation and hopefully one day around the world. … This is what it means to be a woman in Hollywood. It means, I have a platform. I have a chance to make a change. I pray we listen and believe and pay closer attention to those around us to those in need….Be a helping hand. Be a force for change.
