Women reveal 10 reasons why they choose to remain single

Choosing a partner to grow old with is like a social norm but many women are opting to skip relationships and are focusing on building their lives.

By

Neha B.

Aug 27, 2024

By Neha B.

August 27, 2024

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Photo credit: Photo by Keira Burton; Right: Photo by Vlada Karpovich – Cover Image Source: Left: Pexels

Choosing to be with someone in a romantic relationship is solely a matter of how one feels about themselves and their life. Choosing a partner just because your parents like them, or just because it would look good to society, would be the wrong way to go ahead. Given all these factors, many women are opting to skip relationships altogether and instead focus on building their lives. In April 2022, Reddit user u/crypticweirdo9105 brought this matter to attention in a post in the r/AskWomen group, asking women why they chose to remain single and how their experience has been. Comments followed from hundreds of women who opened up about their feelings and struggles of being single.

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Andra Furtado

Being single is a struggle, yes even today. Looking at the rising number of powerful women, it might seem that the world has shifted much in terms of its patriarchal thinking. However, deep within the innards of society, the reality remains as bad as it has always been. When a woman chooses to stay single, she is seen as someone undeserving of any love and affection. But these women are constantly defying the odds by prioritizing their own lives over the life of someone who might dictate what they should do and what they shouldn’t. Here is a list of the top ten reasons why women choose to remain single:

1. Dating apps are overwhelming

“I’m “actively” choosing to be single because I don’t want to go on dating apps. I tried them in the past and they were so overwhelming. My anxiety went through the roof trying to juggle conversations and dodging “creepy” messages.” – u/doodlebug365

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly

2. Bad experience with previous relationships

“I let myself love someone that didn’t love me back the way they should. My life has been ok but really depressing, not feeling like there is something to live for but I know there is I know it will take time.” – u/desperate9832 “Three years ago, my boyfriend and I broke up and it nearly killed me. I took about 6 months to heal and started dating again. The next relationship didn’t work out, and I realized I liked being by myself. I don’t know that I’ll ever remarry or date again. If I do, the standards are really high. I’m very content in my life and in myself and I don’t want to be with someone just for the sake of being with someone.” – u/krlhan11

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3. Haven’t found the perfect match

“I don’t mind being single. It’s not the end of the world. I like my peace and quiet. But I will always be open to having that special someone in my life. I just haven’t found that person yet.” – u/joeymami2015 “I wanted to be whole as a person. I don’t want to depend my happiness on someone else. I don’t want to rush into relationships just for the sake I’m not alone. When I’ve found the person that I want to get vulnerable with; hopefully he will just add up in my life and world.” – u/sakispice “The thing is that I have become very comfortable being with myself, I feel whole. That doesn’t mean that I don’t get lonely. But unless I find someone that will add to my life and make my comfort even more comfortable, I don’t see a point. I never liked the idea of finding a person that completes you, metaphorically speaking princess looking for a prince. I am a queen looking for a king lol.” – u/sparkletempt

Representative Image Source: Pexels | KD Bishop Photography

4. Can’t trust men

“I have a lot of relationship and dating trauma I have to work through before I begin the process of ever trusting a man intimately again.” – u/pixelpixxy “The reason is the current state/condition/attitude of men. They want a traditional dynamic but with modern advantages. So they want a subservient woman who will do all the household things and basically be their mom, and still hold down a full time job and be the adult in the relationship. It’s much more peaceful and less frustrating being single.” – u/laminatedbean

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5. Freedom and peace without worry

“Life is peaceful and I don’t get told sweet chocolate-covered lies.” – u/lisavela “I get to focus on myself without the constant worry of not being enough for somebody or being too much. peaceful.” – u/lace_coffin

6. Focused on career goals

“I was in an abusive relationship for 19 years. It did much damage that I’m trying to heal from but more than anything, it held me back from achieving my professional goals. Now that I’m free, I’m focused on my goals and I won’t be distracted until I’m done.” – u/infactinfarctinfart

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Moose Photos

7. Independence is too sweet to share

“I never consciously made that decision – I’m just too selfish to be willing to adapt to being in that kind of relationship.” – u/mindingmine “It’s worth it to be on my own because I am finally giving my love to the one person that deserves it the most: me.” – u/crochetandkittens

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8. Self-love is a priority

“Since I decided to be single I have achieved so many goals, my career has launched and I bought my first house on my own! From now on I am very careful about who I allow in my life, I don’t settle for less because I don’t need to. Being emotionally and financially independent is the most important thing in life, for women and men. Partnerships are important but taking care of yourself first should always be a priority.” – u/immediate_expert6742

Representative Image Source: Pexels | NGQAH 83

9. Relationships are messy and superficial

“Relationships seem to be so superficial now, no deep connection and love anymore.” – u/bluedelights “The idea of a relationship still feels like giving someone control over my life. And I can’t do that. Plus, I’ve been having fun just doing what I want, and participating in the hook-up scene.” – u/clutterc0re

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10. Life is great without anyone

“I’d like to know if I have a reason that I just haven’t discovered yet. To me, I just don’t feel any desire to seek anyone out. No feelings or fear of loneliness giving that push I guess. Life is great. I see my friends when I do crave some interaction. Having my dog around is always joyful too.” – u/important_coconut_39 “I’m just a lot happier this way in general. I’ve noticed I’m a lot more creative when I’m not in a relationship and I find it fun.” – u/bigbootyomoletlover “I truly enjoy my single life!” – u/meskeptical

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Photo credit: Canva – Surrogate grandparents laughing with small child.

Ideas, Impact

Facebook group helps families without a ‘village’ find surrogate grandparents

Sometimes family is something you create.

Mark Wales

5/1/2026

Raising kids today doesn’t match the historical “it takes a village” experience many grew up with. Not because people don’t care, but because life doesn’t seem to line up that way anymore. Families are spread out across the country and sometimes the world. Few grandparents live just up the street. There’s no built-in help for childcare and no extra sets of hands when things get overwhelming.

In response to that missing piece in raising kids, some people have looked for other ways to create something similar. One path is Surrogate Grandparents – USA, a Facebook-based community that connects older adults with families.

An older man helps a boy water the plants.
Photo credit Canva

Missing out on grandparents nearby, some find new ones online

Founded in 2015, Surrogate Grandparents – USA offers a platform that works like a community bulletin board. The goal is to bring together families bereft of nearby grandparents with older adults looking to share that kind of family role.

Over 14,000 members hope to make a surrogate family connection and the possibility of building real love. They describe the opportunity on their Facebook page as follows:

“A surrogate grandparent is a volunteer or mentor who forms a supportive, grandparent-like relationship with a child or family who may not have local grandparents. These relationships can begin online or in person, often through platforms designed to connect families and older adults.”

The typical online pattern might look like a family posting on the page that their children don’t have nearby grandparents and would love a consistent older presence in their lives. Someone responds. They all start talking. Then, they meet in person.

Those introductions can turn into something steady with regular check-ins. Children receive the face-to-face guidance and experience that an older generation can offer. The surrogate grandparents gain a sense of purpose they hadn’t anticipated at this stage of their lives.

A family picnic.
Photo credit Canva

Surrogate grandparent success stories

One success story was shared in Newsweek. In 2019, Deborah Whatley, then aged 64, joined the Facebook group with her husband. Hoping to fill a need within their own lives, they connected with the Nelsons, and a beautiful relationship quickly blossomed.

The families share photos, meet in person about every month, and text regularly. “We’ve met up more times than I can count,” explained Whatley. “I just wanted to feel included. I have the time, the energy, and the desire. Discovering the surrogate grandparents group instantly brought light back into a part of my life that had turned dark,” she added.

CBS News reported that Anteres Anderson Turner and Louis Turner wished to extend their own family while raising twin boys. Janet Firestein Daw welcomed the idea of grandchildren in her life, saying, “I was getting older and I wanted to get down on the floor and play Legos and trains and read books.”

After meeting through the Facebook group, the relationship between the two families really worked. Daw continued, “It’s indescribable for me, because I haven’t had that experience before to be that grandparent, and I love it.”

Facebook closes the page

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Earlier this year, the Facebook group became inaccessible. There haven’t been any publicly reported reasons from Facebook itself. However, an administrator for the page shared, “Surrogate Grandparents-USA group was unfortunately erroneously removed by Meta. We are actively working to have it reinstated.”

Thankfully, the page was reopened in time. In an Instagram post dated April 11, 2026, they said, “This morning, my Surrogate Grandparents-USA group was officially reinstated.” The post continues, “What a journey this has been—stressful, emotional, and at times incredibly disheartening. But I never stopped believing in the purpose of this community…and the power of speaking up when something isn’t right.”

An extended family at the park.
Photo credit Canva

A shift in how family works

The structures that used to hold families together aren’t as automatic as they once were. For a long time, grandparents lived nearby. Neighbors remained for decades. Communities were tighter, and lives were more interwoven. Support existed from a simple proximity.

But families move. Relationships change. Career and circumstance have stretched people farther apart. Places like Surrogate Grandparents – USA fill roles that certain families are missing. It may not work for everyone, but for many, it’s a chance to build community in a whole new way.

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Photo credit: Canva – A wife takes a piggyback ride on her husband.

Ideas, Voices

Husband steals the spotlight picking up PR packages for wife who became an influencer at 80

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a better video in my life”

Mark Wales

4/29/2026

After a successful career as an artist, 80-year-old Alice Williams decided to transition into the role of social media influencer. What attracted a massive following wasn’t simply this second creative life shared on Instagram, but rather what happened when she posted that her PR packages had arrived.

In a now-viral video highlighted by People, the job of carrying these packages inside belongs to her husband. The sweet spectacle of an elderly man lumbering arms full toward home has resonated with people in a way that’s hard to ignore.

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“POV my wife became an influencer at 80 years old and now I have to get the PR packages”

As the music from No Doubt’s “Just a Girl” carries the scene, the title on the video reads, “POV my wife became an influencer at 80 years old and now I have to get the PR packages.”

The husband, Don Williams, with his arms stacked with boxes and moving carefully but confidently, walks up the driveway like it’s just another regular day. No performance. No spectacle. Just a smile on a warm face during a beautiful afternoon.

His ho-hum attitude and the video’s casualness seem to have tapped into something instantly relatable. He’s just a husband being of service to his wife.

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A small gesture resonates

People online didn’t react to the packages. They reacted to him. Viewers were excited and hoped to have that kind of partnership, too. They also seemed impressed by how fit and natural he appeared. He was just helping out. No complaints. Here are some of those comments:

“So many things I love about this post; the love, the companionship, the nature, the house, the peace, and the supreme shirts”

“Seriously this proves ANY AGE. YOU ARE NEVER LATE”

“KING”

“Oh my heavens, what a sweet man you have! Does he happen to have an older brother, I’m 93 1/2”

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen a better video in my life”

“I think exercising keeps him happy & alive. We need his legs strong!”

“Where am I supposed to find a man like this???”

“Obsessed with this!!!”

“so cuteeee”

“This is the life! Pops is getting those steps in and getting a little strength training in.”

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There’s more to the story than just a viral moment

This story doesn’t end after one viral moment. In a follow-up post, the couple opened the PR packages together. The at-home unboxing became less about the products and more about the playful rhythm between two people enjoying each other’s company.

The appeal of these videos really isn’t about influencer culture. These moments aren’t resonating simply because an older man carries boxes or because we see a kind gesture. Most people aren’t looking for perfect love. Having something that holds up as life changes, that’s valuable.

As Alice Williams opens a new chapter in her life, the relationship doesn’t pause for reinvention. It simply adjusts to it.

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Happy wife, happy life

Interestingly, many healthy relationships feature the woman taking a leadership role or at least having the final say. In a GOOD story about happy marriages, versions of the same four-word advice kept coming up: “Listen to your wife,” “Whatever she says goes,” “She is the boss,” and “Do what she says.” When asked how these men became so wise, one replied, “Over time.”

The sweet Instagram post resonated with many, even though it wasn’t that unusual. Similar videos of couples reuniting, partners sharing small gestures of care, or long-married sweethearts showing affection often reach millions of views.

In each case, it’s probably less about what’s happening on screen. Sure, we all love a feel-good snapshot. However, it’s more about the belief that love can be slow and steady, and that fun adventure can happen without reinventing the wheel. The Williamses offer us all a glimpse of the casually possible. Things are simply good.

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Photo credit: Canva – A toddler on a smartphone (left) and a troubled parent (right).

Ideas, Voices

Elementary teacher shares the 3 biggest mistakes modern parents need to fix immediately

“Let’s bring back consequences.”

Mark Wales

4/23/2026

An elementary school teacher and mother of three who goes by @earlyedventure on TikTok offers a strong perspective on parenting in a recent post. She maintains that modern parents are making three key mistakes that need to be addressed immediately.

In an entertaining and highly viewed post, she doesn’t hold back. Laying out a thoughtful and compelling perspective, she sends a clear message to parents about exactly what needs to change with their kids.

@earlyedventure
Please and thank you!
♬ original sound – earlyedventures

It’s time to throw out the digital tablets

She begins her tough-love discussion with something many have heard, but few have heeded:

“Throw away the iPad. I’m sorry, I don’t care what you say. The data is undeniable. This is different than TV and movie time. The research shows they are vastly different. When you put an iPad in front of them, and they’re getting that constant dopamine hit for an hour, even though you think it’s educational, you are frying their brain. They show up into the classroom. They have zero empathy. They cannot be engaged.”

Solid data support her impassioned opinion. According to a 2024 study in JAMA Pediatrics, digital tablet use was associated with increased anger and frustration outbursts, such as tantrums. Early exposure to screens may also delay both cognitive development and socioemotional growth.

It’s not just the effects of screen time itself that are concerning. It’s what kids may be missing in the moments when they would normally be learning how to struggle, cope, and grow. The Guardian reported that screen time may deprive toddlers of real interactions and exposure to as many as 1,000 spoken words a day.

A frustrated child.
Photo credit: Canva

“Let them fail”

“Let them fail. Don’t tie their shoes for them. When their tower falls down, let them struggle and figure it out. Because when they come to the classroom, the level of helplessness is absurd,” the TikToker explains. “How I frame it to my kids: ‘Wow buddy. I’m really sorry that happened. Let’s figure out how to solve our problem.’ Start giving them that vocabulary now so that when they get older, and they get in these situations, they have that internal dialogue of, ‘Ugh, I need to solve this problem.’”

A 2024 study in Frontiers in Psychology found that children build resilience through repeated experiences of challenge, not avoidance. Trial and error, emotionally distressing experiences, and adult-supported recovery are all critical for learning self-regulation.

A 2024 report in Scientific American said that shielding children from failure can lead to more anxiety, lower coping ability, and reduced independence. By contrast, productive failure can build persistence, and children may develop stronger executive function as they mature.

A child plays with wood blocks.
Photo credit: Canva

“Bring back consequences”

“Let’s bring back consequences,” the TikToker says. “As a parent, make your word as good as gold. That way, they know you mean what you say, and you’re gonna follow through on whatever it is that you say.”

She adds, “I understand positive reinforcement. It has a time and a place for it. However, the real world has consequences for actions. Whether that’s at school or out in the real world, because a cop at the end of the day isn’t gonna give a sh** about what triggers them, when they spit in his face.”

She advocates for kids by challenging their parents, saying, “Do it in a loving way. Do it with boundaries. But, I’m begging you, set them up for the real world. So that when they come to school, when they leave school, they are successful, functioning members of society that people want to be around. Me included.”

Consequences are not punishment. Kids benefit from learning right from wrong through natural and logical repercussions. A 2024 report in Psychology Today said that over-intervention in parenting can prevent children from connecting actions to outcomes. This is a crucial skill for self-regulation and decision-making. Kids who rely too heavily on external direction may struggle to develop autonomy and self-control.

People on social media.
Photo credit: Canva

The TikTok community weighs in

With an assertive, entertaining, and emotionally charged approach, her TikTok post sparked reactions from viewers. Some had thoughts on the message itself, while others shared opinions about the way adults are raising kids today. Here are some of those responses:

“As a teacher, you can walk into a class and IMMEDIATELY tell who’s an iPad kid and who’s not”

“As a behavior teacher, I like to frame it like this – we need to teach them about consequences for there actions now while those consequences are still safe and we can control them. if we wait, the world will be less kind in its consequences.”

“A lot of parents won’t listen to this advice because it actually requires them to work harder at home.”

“All three points- spot on!”

“This made me feel better about my own parenting, thank you”

“YES! YES! YES! Teacher for 22 years! Kids have changed because parenting has changed.”

“Passionate teacher telling the truth. Thank you.”

“And also as parents we should put our phones down and be bored with them.”

“Best TikTok I’ve seen in awhile!! Teacher of 23 years and I could not agree more!!”

“Parent is a VERB”

This conversation resonates so strongly because the TikTok post challenges how children are growing up today. Between tech screens and constant stimulation, teachers and experts question whether kids have enough space to make mistakes and learn from them. Protecting children from discomfort might seem like care, but science suggests it can create people who are less mature and less resilient. This mother of three and teacher of many believes, “If you digest these and apply them, your kids will suck less out in the real world.”

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