The so-called “bathroom issue” has dominated the news for the better part of a year now. Recent outrage and fear upon the removal of transgender protections allowing students to choose the bathroom they identify most closely with has turned a very personal issue (going to the bathroom) into a political one.
But it’s a practical one, too. While much of the nation may just now be getting familiar with the issue, it’s a matter that’s plagued the identity of non-binary citizens their whole lives.
Recently, comedian Rhea Butcher issued her thoughts on the matter via her Twitter account. Her personal experience, though not necessarily universal, offer a perspective that escapes the trappings of states’ rights and legislation in order to explain why something as how you’re told can go to the bathroom can affect how you value yourself.
I've spent my entire life terrified of public bathrooms 1/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I've had people threaten me, harrass me, etc in the women's public restroom 2/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
My parents were always divorced. My dad never took me to the bathroom, I had to go alone. Most visits, I held it 3/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I was scared as a kid to go to the bathroom alone, mostly because of kidnapping scares (I watched too much tv without supervision) 4/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
When I was 5 I went camping w/ my dad and went to a public bathroom alone, while he waited in his truck 5/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I had a chin length bob hair cut and a too big Batman shirt and some "surf" shorts my mom made for me. Slip on fake Vans 6/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I went into the restroom and as I entered, a furious voice bellowed, "WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE?!" 7/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I was terrified. I didn't know what to do. I can't remember if I said "I'm a girl" or if I stayed silent. I can't even remember if I left 8/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I don't know if I told my dad. I told him a bout instances later on in my life and his response was always "well, what'd you expect?" 9/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
In addition to being the first time I was harassed and assaulted for being in a pub restroom, this incident sticks with me 10/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
It hurt me and changed me so deeply, it engrained in me a fear of adults that I still have to this day 11/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
And this person who assaulted me for being what they thought was the wrong gender in the women's bathroom? This person was a man. 12/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
This man was cleaning the women's bathroom and told me I was wrong. Incorrect. I shouldn't be there, I shouldn't be me. He was "Right." 13/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
The bathroom fight is about so much more than peeing.
It's about the right to exist. To be. /14— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
Public bathrooms are a concentrated version of gender conformity. Not only are literally forced through a "woman" door or "man" door 15/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
We then have to fit through an even narrower understanding of what SOMEONE else thinks is visually appropriate for that gender 16/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
I am serving jury duty right now. Moments ago, I had to reassure a confused woman that she was, indeed, in the women's restroom 18/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
This happens everyday to trans, nonbinary, genderqueer folks. We have to hide or edit or confront. Eyes everywhere. Every. Single. Day. 19/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
And this law is about KIDS. Children. Little tiny people. Forced to enter a space that scares them. Told by adults they are wrong. 20/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
My mom was always supportive. This was 1987, she did her best. Told me to ask where the women's restroom was instead of just restroom 21/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
She told me I was perfect and I could do and be whatever I wanted. 22/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
She's a seamstress and made me dresses. She never once made me feel bad for not wanting her dresses, for actively despising them 23/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
My mom works at a convenience pharmacy in Akron, Ohio. She wears a safety pin to work every day. 24/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
In conclusion: we need your help. Kids need your help. See them, love them. It's more than just needing to pee. It's about being. 25/— river buddy butcher ? (@rivbutcher) February 23, 2017
Reddit user Girlfriendhatesmefor’s three-year-old pitbull, Otis, had recently become overprotective of his wife. So he asked the online community if they knew what might be wrong with the dog.
“A week or two ago, my wife got some sort of stomach bug,” the Reddit user wrote under the subreddit /r/dogs. “She was really nauseous and ill for about a week. Otis is very in tune with her emotions (we once got in a fight and she was upset, I swear he was staring daggers at me lol) and during this time didn’t even want to leave her to go on walks. We thought it was adorable!”
His wife soon felt better, butthe dog’s behavior didn’t change.
Girlfriendhatesmefor began to fear that Otis’ behavior may be an early sign of an aggression issue or an indication that the dog was hurt or sick.
So he threw a question out to fellow Reddit users: “Has anyone else’s dog suddenly developed attachment/aggression issues? Any and all advice appreciated, even if it’s that we’re being paranoid!”
The most popular response to his thread was by ZZBC.
Any chance your wife is pregnant?
ZZBC | Reddit
The potential news hit Girlfriendhatesmefor like a ton of bricks. A few days later, Girlfriendhatesmefor posted an update and ZZBC was right!
“The wifey is pregnant!” the father-to-be wrote. “Otis is still being overprotective but it all makes sense now! Thanks for all the advice and kind words! Sorry for the delayed reply, I didn’t check back until just now!”
Redditors responded with similar experiences.
Anecdotal I know but I swear my dog knew I was pregnant before I was. He was super clingy (more than normal) and was always resting his head on my belly.
realityisworse | Reddit
So why do dogs get overprotective when someone is pregnant?
Jeff Werber, PhD, president and chief veterinarian of the Century Veterinary Group in Los Angeles, told Health.com that “dogs can also smell the hormonal changes going on in a woman’s body at that time.” He added the dog may “not understand that this new scent of your skin and breath is caused by a developing baby, but they will know that something is different with you—which might cause them to be more curious or attentive.”
The big lesson here is to listen to your pets and to ask questions when their behavior abruptly changes. They may be trying to tell you something, and the news may be life-changing.
Throughout history, women have stood up and fought to break down barriers imposed on them from stereotypes and societal expectations. The trailblazers in these photos made history and redefined what a woman could be. In doing so, they paved the way for future generations to stand up and continue to fight for equality.
While conspiracy theories are not limited to any topic, there is one type of event that seems particularly likely to spark them: mass shootings, typically defined as attacks in which a shooter kills at least four other people.
When one person kills many others in a single incident, particularly when it seems random, people naturally seek out answers for why the tragedy happened. After all, if a mass shooting is random, anyone can be a target.
