Having a tough time finding a job? So are all your friends who saddled themselves with mountains of debt and maxed out their credit cards so that they could earn a doctoral degree—only to discover that today’s Ph.D. job market, especially in the humanities, isn’t exactly rosy. Now MLA Jobs, a new Tumblr blog from the Modern Language Association—the professional organization for language and literature academics—expertly satirizes the job descriptions universities post.

The blog, which has “putting the AACK! back in the tenure track” as its slogan, started on September 18 with a pithy post poking fun at the Ivory Tower’s unrealistic desire for young faculty members with significant expertise: “Yale is hiring an Asst. Prof. of English with specialization in early modern. Must have completed PhD no later than 2015.”


Two weeks and nearly 60 posts later, the Tumblr features some seriously laugh-out-loud fake job ads. Gems like, “UCLA is hiring an assistant professor in Latina culture and literature who will also be a part of our interdisciplinary seminar on Kant. Secondary specialization must include colonial American literature, 1990s cyberpunk, graphic novels, and the history of the Jew’s harp in Thailand,” mock the unrealistic qualifications colleges and universities expect from applicants.

Massively Open Online Courses like Coursera and EdX aren’t spared the satire either. A fake ad for the University of Virginia “seeks Professor of English with specialty in ‘educational’ technology for setting up MOOCs. Position will be responsible for attracting national attention with bombastic, unproven claims about the future of education; ideal candidate will be heavily read in David Brooks.”

While actually landing a faculty job would make the unemployed Ph.D. in your life happiest, this is a Tumblr that’s sure to make them smile. MLA Jobs is seeking submissions from job hunters on the frontlines, so if you’ve come across a particularly satire-worthy posting, send it their way.

Photo via Wikimedia Commons

  • Man’s dog suddenly becomes protective of his wife, Internet clocks the reason right away
    Dogs have impressive observational powers.Photo credit: Canva

    Reddit user Girlfriendhatesmefor’s three-year-old pitbull, Otis, had recently become overprotective of his wife. So he asked the online community if they knew what might be wrong with the dog.

    “A week or two ago, my wife got some sort of stomach bug,” the Reddit user wrote under the subreddit /r/dogs. “She was really nauseous and ill for about a week. Otis is very in tune with her emotions (we once got in a fight and she was upset, I swear he was staring daggers at me lol) and during this time didn’t even want to leave her to go on walks. We thought it was adorable!”

    His wife soon felt better, butthe dog’s behavior didn’t change.

    pregnancy signs, dogs and pregnancy, pitbull behavior, pet intuition, dog overprotection, Reddit stories, viral Reddit, dog instincts, canine emotions, dog owner tips
    Otis knew before they did. Canva

    Girlfriendhatesmefor began to fear that Otis’ behavior may be an early sign of an aggression issue or an indication that the dog was hurt or sick.

    So he threw a question out to fellow Reddit users: “Has anyone else’s dog suddenly developed attachment/aggression issues? Any and all advice appreciated, even if it’s that we’re being paranoid!”

    The most popular response to his thread was by ZZBC.

    Any chance your wife is pregnant?

    ZZBC | Reddit

    The potential news hit Girlfriendhatesmefor like a ton of bricks. A few days later, Girlfriendhatesmefor posted an update and ZZBC was right!

    “The wifey is pregnant!” the father-to-be wrote. “Otis is still being overprotective but it all makes sense now! Thanks for all the advice and kind words! Sorry for the delayed reply, I didn’t check back until just now!”

    Redditors responded with similar experiences.

    Anecdotal I know but I swear my dog knew I was pregnant before I was. He was super clingy (more than normal) and was always resting his head on my belly.

    realityisworse | Reddit

    So why do dogs get overprotective when someone is pregnant?

    Jeff Werber, PhD, president and chief veterinarian of the Century Veterinary Group in Los Angeles, told Health.com that “dogs can also smell the hormonal changes going on in a woman’s body at that time.” He added the dog may “not understand that this new scent of your skin and breath is caused by a developing baby, but they will know that something is different with you—which might cause them to be more curious or attentive.”

    The big lesson here is to listen to your pets and to ask questions when their behavior abruptly changes. They may be trying to tell you something, and the news may be life-changing.

    This article originally appeared last year.

  • Throughout history, women have stood up and fought to break down barriers imposed on them from stereotypes and societal expectations. The trailblazers in these photos made history and redefined what a woman could be. In doing so, they paved the way for future generations to stand up and continue to fight for equality.

  • ,

    Why mass shootings spawn conspiracy theories

    Mass shootings and conspiracy theories have a long history.

    While conspiracy theories are not limited to any topic, there is one type of event that seems particularly likely to spark them: mass shootings, typically defined as attacks in which a shooter kills at least four other people.

    When one person kills many others in a single incident, particularly when it seems random, people naturally seek out answers for why the tragedy happened. After all, if a mass shooting is random, anyone can be a target.

    Pointing to some nefarious plan by a powerful group – such as the government – can be more comforting than the idea that the attack was the result of a disturbed or mentally ill individual who obtained a firearm legally.


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