“63,000,000,000 Billion”

An incarcerated man in South Carolina is suing the alleged canine-killer Michael Vick to the tune of (drum roll), “63,000,000,000 billion dollars,” whatever that means. With a comically frivolous figure such as “63,000,000,000 billion” there must be an equally preposterous set of charges to match, right? Ding. The inmate, one Jonathan Lee Riches, alleges that Vick stole two of his pit bulls, used them for fighting, sold them on Ebay, and “used the proceeds to purchase missiles from the Iran government.” Why missiles? Because of Vick’s alliance with Al Qaeda of course. Hell, we’re convinced.

Demanding that the money (remember that by money we mean 63,000,000,000 billion dollars) be backed by “gold and silver” and be delivered directly to the gate of The Williamsburg Federal Correctional facility, Riches implores Vick to “stop physically hurting my feelings and dashing my hopes.”

All we have to say is, Vick better pay up.

You can read the entire filing here.

Via Boing Boing.