Elliott has two scars across his chest where his breasts used to be. He has full sideburns down his gaunt cheeks, a strong chin, and sharp jawline. His voice is not deep enough to be considered baritone. At 22, he looks like a rather boyish young man. You would not mistake him for a woman, although he was born a woman. There’s a chance you might mistake him for Morrissey, which is the look he’s going for. The asexual British rocker poet has long been the patron saint of gay and androgynous youth.

Elliott’s story is one we are hearing more and more these days. About the time he hit puberty, his body started developing in a way that was incongruent to how he perceived himself. Breasts, new thatches of hair, and an emerging feminine shape pushed Elliott toward an identity that felt alien. By 16, he felt as though his body no longer belonged to him. “It was something happening to me. Like it wasn’t even a part of me.”


To say that Elliott felt like a man trapped in a woman’s body or that he was repelled by his own private parts, as the typical definition of a transsexual would have you presume, would be inaccurate. Elliott didn’t want to escape one sex role to embrace another, but he did have a desire to feel “more manly.” Disoriented and nervous about what was happening to him, he told his parents that he thought he was, perhaps, maybe, “bisexual?” But as time went on Elliott found that his feelings had less to do with which sex he was attracted to and more to do with which sex he wanted to be. In fact, for his age, Elliott thought very little about sex. He had somewhat resigned himself to a life of solitude, as lonely teenagers are wont to do. As Morrissey sings, “You don’t have to tell me … I know I’m unlovable.”

His junior year of high school, Elliott found out about hormonal replacement therapy. Once he turned 18 he would be eligible to receive testosterone injections without parental consent and eventually his body would take on more masculine characteristics, including facial hair, a broader brow, deeper voice, and decreased breast size. To get the treatment, however, Elliott would have to undergo 15 sessions with a psychologist to prove that his biological sex caused him enough distress that it merited reassignment. That psychologist would then give him a letter addressed to a physician certifying that Elliott suffered from gender- identity disorder.

Elliott never believed he had a “disorder,” so he feared he would give the wrong answers, or not display enough distress. “It was all so ridiculous,” he tells me. “I was contemptuous of the whole thing. I basically had to keep meeting with this psychology grad student who handed me a fifty-question checklist on our first session. You can look up symptoms online to make sure you get your diagnosis letter, so I made sure I did that.” One thing trans-themed forums and blogs recommend is journaling about a “real life experience” to show a therapist. According to the “standards of care” put out by the World Professional Association for Transgender Health for the medical and psychiatric community, it’s recommended that prior to hormone therapy, the patient has a “documented experience” dressed as the gender he or she desires to be. This ultimately means going in drag to work, school, or among family to confront possible anxieties that come with a new gender and face “external consequences.”

Though the process frustrated Elliott, he did not want to buy hormones on the black market (which you can also do online) and self-administer, so he stuck with it, hoping for a positive diagnosis. Which is to say, he was hoping to be declared mentally ill—at least according to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), the standardized criteria written by the American Psychiatric Association and used by clinicians, psychia- trists, and psychologists to diagnose their patients. The DSM lists gender-identity disorder (GID) as a certifiable mental illness. A patient, like Elliott, exhibits not only the desire to become another gender but also demonstrates “relationship difficulties” because of the distress he or she feels about being the wrong one.

However, all that could change.

Since it was initially published in 1952, the DSM has undergone only four major revisions, and with each new edition there comes, rightfully, a great deal of controversy and advocacy, in and around the mental-health field. After all, the DSM is the book that separates the sane from the pathological, the neurotics from the normals. The slightest shift in sentence structure can cause major reverberations across the fields of medicine, biology, and pharmacology. When DSM-IV broadened the definition of bipolar disorder in 1994, there was a huge rise in prescriptions for “mood stabilizing” drugs that, prior to the change, were usually only recommended for people who suffered from convulsions or psychosis.

In certain cases, like, say, homosexuality, revising the DSM can have a vast social impact. The first two editions of the DSM classified homosexuality as a sexual disorder right along pedophilia and rubbing against strangers in public. It wasn’t until 1980
that homosexuality was removed entirely from the DSM, a move to which many activists, scholars, and clinicians attribute the destigmatization of homosexuality in American culture.

So when it was announced last year that the newest version of the DSM, to be published in 2013, would make significant revisions to the GID diagnosis, swaths of activists inside and out of the psychiatric establishment saw an opportunity to have the diagnosis removed altogether. They argue that the diagnosis further isolates transgender individuals, who are already a highly vulnerable and ostracized group.

The DSM work group assigned to gender identity disorder, a panel of specialized field experts, has already bowed to some external pressures. It has made clear that it intends to change the name of the diagnosis from “disorder” to “dysphoria”—which describes a passing mood rather than a fixed state. The work group has also made public its plans to not only preserve the core GID diagnosis, but to retain an even more controversial entry: GID in children.

* * *

Those who are in favor of keeping gender identity disorder in the DSM have two main arguments. The first is a clinical utility argument: If a person, especially a child, is distressed, suicidal, or self-harming because he or she feels incongruent with his or her gender, GID offers a diagnosis and path for treatment.

Robert Spitzer, the architect of DSM-III (the edition that removed homosexuality), acknowledged the fundamental question the term “disorder” dredges up.

“The concept of disorder is man-made,” Spitzer wrote in 1981. “Over the course of time, all cultures have evolved concepts of illness or disease in order to identify certain conditions that, because of their negative consequences, implicitly have a call to action” to caretakers, to the person with the condition, and to society. Spitzer concluded, “The advantage of identifying such conditions is that it makes it easier for individuals with those conditions to receive care that may be helpful to them.”

The second argument in favor of keeping GID in the diagnostic manual is where things get ethically murky. The removal of the diagnosis may also remove insurance coverage for transsexual adults who are being treated with hormonal or surgical reassignment. As of now, a diagnosis of mental illness is the only mechanism that transsexuals have for medical insurance to cover mastectomies, testosterone injections, and genital reconstruction surgeries (though very few insurance companies cover any sort of gender reassignment, because it is most often considered “cosmetic”).

Megan Smith, a Nebraska-based psychotherapist and an advocate for the removal of GID from the DSM, claims that the insurance argument is the one she most often encounters. Smith believes keeping the diagnosis for the sake of insurance coverage is “unethical and unscientific.” Smith argues, “I don’t believe it’s our obligation as mental health professionals to change psychiatric evaluations in order to play ball with insurance companies.”

When it comes to the issue of distress in children, the proposed revisions put the burden of proof on the parents. In the current proposal the work group includes a questionnaire to be completed by parents about their young sons:

Over the past six months, how intense was your son’s avoidance of rough-and-tumble play?

Over the past six months, how intense was your son’s dislike of his sexual anatomy (e.g., that he dislikes or hates his penis or testes)?

Over the past six months, how intense was your son’s desire for the sexual anatomy of a girl (e.g., sits to urinate, pretends to have breasts, would like to have a vagina)?

Or their young daughters:

Over the past six months, how intense was your daughter’s preference for the toys, games, and activities typical of boys?

Over the past six months, how intense was your daughter’s preference for boy playmates?

Over the past six months, how intense was your daughter’s desire for the sexual anatomy of a boy (e.g., that she would like to have a penis or to grow one; stands to urinate)?

For the activists opposed to keeping the diagnosis in the DSM-V, like Smith, this brings up a fairly obvious question: Whose distress are you treating—the child’s or the parents’? When Smith worked for a non-profit that served the homeless in Omaha, she encountered several transgender teens who had been cast out by their families. “Childhood is a time for people to explore their genders,” she says. “Much of the distress I see in my young patients isn’t from wanting to be another gender, it’s the anxiety of having to become a total outsider.”

The DSM does not allow much, if any, gender ambiguity—the word “transgender” appears nowhere in the current DSM or in any of its proposed revisions. “A lot of people I’ve spoken with don’t identify as either male or female,” says Smith. “They see themselves as gender queer, or atypical gender, or just plain trans,” never completely going over to one sex or the other.

The most nefarious outcome of GID remaining in the DSM, activists believe, will be the introduction of “reparative treatment” given by psychiatrists to transgender children, adolescents, and adults. Though condemned by the American Psychiatric Association in 1998, reparative or conversion therapy aims to cure homosexuality (there usually exists a moral or religious component to this sort of faux treatment). The APA spoke out against reparative treat- ment because it operated on the assumption “that homosexuality is a mental illness.” As long as gender-identity disorder remains in the DSM, the LGBT community will worry that society will view transgender people as in need of “fixing.”

However, Jack Dresher, a New York–based psychiatrist and a member of the 13-person Sexual and Gender Identity Disorder Work Group for DSM-V, wrote in a recent paper that no one in the work group condones “fixing” trans teens or gay teens. Psychiatry has historically conflated sexual orientation with sexual identity, he writes, but the work group rightfully distinguishes these into separate categories.

While Dresher acknowledges the parallels between the efforts of the gay-rights movement and the trans community to normalize their presence in society at large, he believes that acceptance of queer-identified individuals is progressing rapidly and would not be offset by GID staying on the books. Though he admits there would undoubtedly be some stigma for those diagnosed—as there is for individuals diagnosed with bipolar disorder or major depression—he thinks keeping the diagnosis for people who have distress about their bodies and identities “would be a less harmful choice.”

Dresher ultimately recommends adoption of less “stigmatizing language towards gender variant individuals” and a narrower definition of GID children to include just those suffering distress about their anatomy.

* * *

When Emmie told her parents that she was transgender at age 14, there were all kinds of details to work out. Not only would Emmie, who now goes by Jesse, need to change her documented sex at her private school, she would also need to figure out where she was going to change for P.E. and which school bathrooms she was allowed to use. Now 16, Jesse is identified as a boy by his school and peers. To minimize confusion for the other students, Jesse uses the nongen- der faculty bathrooms, changes in a separate room, and was asked by the administration to not wear a skirt, which would be now
be considered “drag.”

“The skirt thing was kinda funny because if you ask me, I don’t believe in a gender binary,” Jesse tells me on the phone after I contact him via the Transgender Student Rights Facebook page he runs. “I think of gender as more of a spectrum,” he tells me in a high-pitched voice that absolutely betrays his biological sex.

Before Jesse came out as transgender, he was in therapy four days a week because of his tumultuous childhood. When Jesse was 9 years old his mother died from anorexia and his father agreed to have the couple’s best friends adopt Jesse. After Jesse came out to his adoptive parents, they told his biological father. Jesse and his dad went to lunch, where his father showed him pictures of himself dressed like a woman. He told Jesse that from time to time he enjoys dressing up in drag, so there was nothing for him to feel ashamed about.

“My dad told me he always thought I’d be a weirdo because I came from such an eccentric family,” Jesse giggles.

When I ask how he feels about the possibility that under the DSM proposals he technically could be classified as mentally ill, Jesse laughs it off. “I think everyone could benefit from therapy, so while I would like to see the diagnosis totally gone from the DSM, because, like I said, I don’t believe in a gender binary, I don’t think therapists are the enemy.”

Jesse hasn’t decided whether he wants to go on hormone treatments once he turns 18. “I might want to have a kid one day and I don’t want to mess with that possibility right now.” Though, he admits, it would be nice to take his voice down to a lower pitch. “I might get top surgery [double mastectomy],” Jesse muses, but still isn’t sure. “You know, there are some days I wish my boobs would go away; there are other days where I kinda like them.”

  • The conversations people avoid may be the ones they would enjoy the most 
    Photo credit: CanvaTwo women enjoy some small talk.

    Before having a conversation with a stranger, many people assume the interaction will be boring, uncomfortable, or simply not worth the effort. A recent study found that people routinely underestimate how enjoyable and meaningful these interactions can be.

    In a recent paper, “Conversations About Boring Topics Are More Interesting Than We Think,” researchers suggest one of the biggest obstacles to human connection may be our own expectations. Across nine experiments involving 1,800 participants, talking on topics people expected to be boring turned out to be far more engaging than they predicted.

    human connection, anxiety, relationship science, conversation skills
    A good conversation.
    Photo credit Canva

    People unknowingly avoid meaningful conversations with strangers

    Elizabeth Trinh, a doctoral student at the University of Michigan and lead study author, placed people in conversations about topics that they identified as boring. Options varied from the stock market to cats to vegan diets.

    The study asked participants to predict how a conversation with unfamiliar people might go. Most participants expected less enjoyment, less connection, and less value from the exchange. The results suggest that people are surprisingly poor at forecasting their own social experiences.

    After the interaction with a stranger, the majority believed it went far better and was more engaging than they had predicted. In an American Psychological Association press release, Trinh said, “People consistently expected conversations about seemingly boring topics to be less interesting than they turned out to be.”

    The study indicates people might place too much emphasis on the topic and situation itself. Because once people start actually talking, the content matters far less than the interaction. “What really drives enjoyment is engagement,” explained Trinh.

    “Feeling heard, responding to each other, and discovering unexpected details about someone’s life can make even a mundane topic meaningful,” she added.

    psychology, interpersonal perception, social interactions
    Co-workers enjoy a good conversation.
    Photo credit Canva

    People opt out of potential connections

    The study shows that people may be opting out of potential connections because they assume that opportunity isn’t worth their time and energy. It also challenges the idea that meaningful conversations require a special chemistry or a pre-existing relationship.

    Instead, ordinary interactions with neighbors, coworkers, or people standing in a line may offer more emotional value than once believed. “Even a brief conversation about everyday life may be more rewarding than we expect,” said Trinh.

    Researchers have repeatedly found that people feel better after engaging with strangers, even when expectations of awkwardness are high. They report feeling happier and more connected. Responding to another person, sharing experiences, and discovering unexpected connections far outweigh the importance of a strong starting point.

    An epidemic of loneliness

    These findings offer a reassuring contrast to the belief that modern loneliness is a growing problem that may not be easily solved. Avenues for connection may be far more abundant than many people think.

    Several proposed solutions to loneliness and social isolation involve building new friendships through social groups and new hobbies. But Trinh’s research suggests a far simpler approach. People may be surrounded by opportunities that they routinely dismiss. Most of us assume boring, small talk won’t go anywhere, yet even a brief chat with a coworker or stranger may offer more social value than people realize.

    The basic, everyday exchanges people have been avoiding might actually be some of the most valuable. Rather than planning the perfect social outing, a willingness to talk with a stranger that we might otherwise avoid could lead to a more meaningful experience.

  • How one World Cup superfan bought a giant, rare FIFA soccer ball that barely fits in his car
    Photo credit: @kickballdad on YouTubeKickball Dad gets the ultimate World Cup ball.

    The 2026 FIFA World Cup brings out a wild streak in footie fans. For one fan though, his passion for the sport led him to pursue the ultimate piece of memorabilia for months. Then, it happened: to the envy of every FIFA fan, the fan was able to purchase a giant World Cup soccer ball.

    Kevin Cronin, better known as Kickball Dad online, was excited to see an Adidas Trionda Jumbo soccer ball. The massive 31.5-inch ball was part of a store’s display. 

    “We need one of those,” said Cronin.

    Upon seeing it, Cronin immediately asked if he could buy it. The store said it was for display only. The cost of the sold-out ball typically goes for $320.00, but would likely be higher in price since Cronin was lucky enough to find it in the secondary market. That didn’t stop him.

    The store management was unprepared for Cronin’s determination and fandom. For months, he would come in and visit the store, asking again and again if he could buy the incredibly large soccer ball. He was told again and again that it wasn’t for sale.

    Until it was.

    He got the ball!

    One day, Cronin found the right store manager willing to sell him the ball. Cronin excitedly checked out the ball at the cash register. In a video of the purchase, Cronin’s daughter Alyssa can be heard giggling the entire time as Cronin triumphantly lifts the ball into the air.

    “I’m like Atlas,” said Cronin. “I got the World Cup on my shoulders!”

    Buying the giant ball was one massive task, but soon came the next one: trying to fit the ball into Cronin’s small four-door car. This gave everyone, including Cronin, second thoughts. But Cronin’s will was strong.

    “Why did we buy this?” asked Cronin’s son.

    “Because we have W.C.F.,” Cronin replied. “World Cup Fever.”

    Cronin was able to squeeze the massive soccer ball into the backseat and drive it home. He pried the ball out of the car and into his house, where his wife greeted him with laughter.

    “We got it,” he said victoriously as he placed it on the kitchen counter.

    Soccer fans and brands alike congratulated him

    Cronin’s video went viral on Instagram with many soccer fans commenting on his determination:

    “This is a triumph a man dreams about.”

    “Never give up!!!!!!”

    “It’s meant to be 💞

    Even major brands reached out to give their kudos:

    “Some display pieces are just too awesome to leave behind.” said Lego.

    “The look on your wife’s face = priceless. What’s next? 🤣 quipped Adidas Football.

    “Mission accomplished 🏆 shared Dick’s Sporting Goods.

    Who is ‘Kickball Dad’?

    This isn’t the first time Kevin Cronin/Kickball Dad has made waves online. Cronin has become an avid content creator known for his fandom of most sports—specifically his kids’ sports games and Miami Dolphins football. Fans see videos of him shopping at the grocery store, going to sporting events, sharing his sports takes, and even birding. His daughter Alyssa shoots and edits the videos, leading to a fun family side hustle as content creators.

    As the 2026 World Cup starts, it’ll be fun to see fans all over the world show their enthusiasm whether it’s through loud cheers with their families or creating fun videos starring a hard-won giant soccer ball.

  • Coloradans can now fight against a weaker economy and hunger through the ‘Tamale Act’
    Photo credit: CanvaColorado is allowing more people to sell homemade meals to others.

    The citizens of Colorado are being presented with an opportunity to make more money through home-cooked meals. The state has passed into law the “Tamale Act,” which allows people to make and sell food made in their personal kitchens. This creates a means for many people to make supplemental income and/or start a full-fledged home-based business. 

    Previously, there were restrictions for folks to sell food outside of official commercial businesses and restaurants. Now that the Tamale Act has been written into law, many restrictions are lifted, including access to foods that were previously prohibited. The law is an expansion of the Colorado Cottage Foods Act that allowed the sale of non-refrigerated food items excluding dairy and meat products.

    There are still requirements in play for safety and public health. The sellers must complete a food safety and handling course with proof of completion. The homemade food also cannot be transported more than once or for longer than two hours. 

    Colorado’s officials weigh in

    According to government officials, this law allows opportunities for both home cooks and consumers alike.

    “This is a big win for Colorado cooking entrepreneurs!” said Governor Jared Polis in a statement. “This important bill expands Coloradan’s access to tasty homemade foods while supporting small kitchens and empowering Colorado’s cooking entrepreneurs and small business owners. Some of our favorite restaurants were started in a home kitchen, and today we are taking action to remove barriers for home-based cooks to earn a living and legally sell delicious food to Coloradans growing our economy and supporting communities,” said Governor Polis.

    “People already sell prepared food – like tamales, pupusas, and baked goods – to their friends, family, and neighbors,” added Senate Majority Leader Robert Rodriguez. “This is a way that Coloradans share their culture, support each other, and work hard to earn extra money and support their families. This law creates a pathway for this to happen in a safe and legal way.”

    Addressing two issues with one law

    This act helps two growing issues in the United States overall. Per a Talker Research 2024 poll, 77% of Americans feel too exhausted to cook for themselves after work. Because of this, many people turn to unhealthy, cheap takeout for sustenance rather than healthier home cooked meals. Laws like the Tamale Act provide an opportunity for people to pay people within their community for a home cooked meal that is likely cheaper and healthier than fast food from a national chain.

    The other issue, as mentioned by the Colorado government, is the growing need for a side hustle. Per a 2026 survey by Omnisend, one in three Americans turned to a side hustle to help stay afloat with their bills. This is to survive, mind you, not thrive. According to recent Gallup polls, the increasingly difficult job market has shown many that they can better benefit from turning their delicious recipes into a side business.

    How to start a home cooking business

    If you want to start a home cooking business, there are a few things to keep in mind.

    First, the legality. While Colorado has just reduced restrictions on selling homemade food, there may be more red tape in your state. The Food and Drug Administration recommends researching your local laws to see what’s restricted. You’ll also want to know what kind of permits, licenses, and certifications you’ll need before putting your food up for sale.

    After all of that is researched and settled, there are other considerations. The Food and Liability Insurance Program offers some tips: depending on the scale of your homemade food business, you may want to invest in specific equipment to make larger batches of meals. You may also want to register as an LLC and/or get your food business insured.

    Marketing is also an important aspect. Setting up a website and social media accounts featuring a brand can help spread the word locally. If you want tips for that, you may want to scour online for your favorite homemade food businesses and ask what worked for them.

    With a little bit of research and grit, many people in local communities will be fed either through delicious home cooked meals or through the profit generated from them.

Explore More Stories

Work

6 phrases to use to tactfully disagree with your boss and not jeopardize your job

Care

A dementia patient and his wife got their lives back thanks to a ‘coat rack-like’ robot

Science

A bonobo’s make-believe tea party has scientists rethinking whether imagination belongs only to humans

Society

People thought cats lay on laptops to get in the way. The real reason is surprisingly sweet.