In this trailer for a new documentary about overfishing called The End of the Line, one interviewee says "We are fighting a war against fish...and we are winning." And, despite that somewhat confusing way of framing it, this is not good. Statistics about overfishing make it clear it's a crisis-level problem and, indeed, this movie is being compared to An Inconvenient Truth.[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QWB8KJ1aIJ4Look out for lots more on the health of our oceans in our upcoming Water issue in July. In the meantime, The End of the Line looks great. It comes out on June 9th.
Articles
Mom’s blistering rant on how men should be blamed for all unwanted pregnancies going crazy viral.
“All unwanted pregnancies are caused by the the irresponsible ejaculations of men”.
04.24.23
Members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, commonly known as Mormons, are a conservative group who aren't known for being vocal about sex.
But best selling author, blogger, and mother of six, Gabrielle Blair, has kicked that stereotype to the curb with a pointed thread on reducing unwanted pregnancies. And her sights are set directly at men.
She wrote a Cliff's Notes version of her thread on her blog:
"If you want to stop abortion, you need to prevent unwanted pregnancies. And men are 100% responsible for unwanted pregnancies. No for real, they are. Perhaps you are thinking: IT TAKES TWO! And yes, it does take two for _intentional_ pregnancies.
But ALL unwanted pregnancies are caused by the irresponsible ejaculations of men. Period. Don't believe me? Let me walk you through it. Let's start with this: women can only get pregnant about 2 days each month. And that's for a limited number of years."
Here's the whole thread. It's long, but totally worth the read.
Blair's controversial tweet storm have been liked hundreds of thousands of time, with the original tweet earning nearly 200,000 likes since it was posted on Thursday, September, 13.
The reactions have earned her both praise and scorn.
Most of the scorn was from men.
"You had me until you said men are 100% responsible. We aren't. We are 50% responsible, excluding rape which needs to be regarded differently obv. As soon as men are blamed 100% we switch off as you sound like one of those raging anti-men types. Sorry."
— Jarrod Parker (@JarrodParker) September 16, 2018
But Blair wouldn't budge.
For other men, the tweet thread was a real eye-opener.
"Hi there. This has really resonated with me. I am strongly pro-choice, but - shamefully - hadn't thought it through until I read this thread. And you're right: male organisms are responsible. We are harming those people whom we profess to love. It's systematic and it's wrong."
— Adam Rutland (@Adam_Rutland) September 16, 2018\n
“@designmom I just want you to know from a guy that your entire line of argument on this thread is 100% accurate. Thanks for taking the time to put this out there. Every adult in this country SHOULD read this.”
Women everywhere applauded Blair's bold thread.
This article originally appeared on 02.22.19
Articles
Tech entrepreneur created a trap that drives email scammers crazy and you can use it, too
We very much approve.
04.24.23
Tweet merged with image via Christiaan Colen / Flickr/Creative Commons.
At least 3.4 billion fake emails are sent around the world every day according to Security Magazine. These account for untold millions of losses due to online scams.
Historically, the "Nigerian Prince" scam is one of the most popular. It typically involves the fraudster promising the victim a significant share of a large sum of money, in return for a small up-front payment. Once the fraudster gets the money they either disappear or continue to concoct more scanrios to fleece the victim.
This scam dates back hundreds of years when scammers would contact businesses asking for money to get a wealthy relative out of a Spanish prison.
Boris Veldhuijzen van Zanten, a serial entrepreneur who is the founder of The Next Web tech events, shared how he fights back against scammers, and it's pretty brilliant. He created a fake company called Nordic Procurement and when the scammer emails it, they're sucked into a time-consuming rabbit hole of out-of-the-office replies.
The point is to waste as much of the scammer's time as possible so they prey on fewer people.
None
Nordic Procurement has a pretty funny tagline: "The only value of wasted time is knowledge. Stop wasting time, start trusting Nordic Procurement Services." A procurement company takes over a company's dealings with outside vendors and tries to come up with favorable terms.
Scammers who find themselves dealing with Nordic Procurement will soon learn that there is a lot of red tape in the industry.
Boris created a scammer trap, Nordic Procurement Services.
After its initial success, Boris is looking for ways to scale and automate and his anti-scammer strategy.
When you email John you get a lot of emojis and sales guy talk and a ton of disclaimers.
Hi there, great to have established first contact and here's to making
lots and lots of money together! 💸 💸 💸 💸 💸😂
Unfortunately, I can't send you the Request Form just yet, as we are
still awaiting your company registration information and will need a
copy of your passport or driver's license to verify your identity.
Apparently those attachments we're lost somewhere, which Helena
apparently already notified you about. Maybe you missed that one.
Or it is our antiquated email system that deleted them, you never know! 😂 😂 😂
Anyway, please scan the original documents and attach them to an email
and send that to helena@noprocurement.com. As soon as I receive word
that the documents have been received, I'll send you the request form
so we can be in business.
If you haven't heard from me in a week or two, feel free to reach out
again, my inbox is open for you 24/7, and I tend to reply within 72
hours. Have an amazing day!!!! ABC (Always be closing), make it rain,
mo money more problems!
Lots of LOLZ,
John Negroni
Proud and ambitious junior account manager
Nordic Procurement Services, all the way boyzzzzz
👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼
👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼 👊🏼
Disclaimer: The information contained in this e-mail communication is
solely intended for the person to whom it has been sent. If someone
other than the intended recipient should receive or come into
possession of this e-mail communication, he/she will not be entitled
to read, disseminate, disclose or duplicate it.
!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!
If you are not the intended recipient, you are requested to inform
Nordic Procurement of this by replying to this message, and to destroy
the original e-mail communication. Nordic Procurement, registered in
the Commercial Register under number 198273680, is neither liable for
the correct and complete transmission of the information contained in
this e-mail communication nor for any delay in its receipt.
!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!
Privacy notice: We are used to dealing with confidential information
and understand that protecting your privacy is key to building and
maintaining good relations. We are doing the utmost to use the
information that has been trusted to us in the right way. Nordic
Procurement is a part of Nordic Procurement plc, and complies with the
policies from Nordic Procurement. You can check our Privacy Statement
on the Nordic Procurement website as well as on our own website.
!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!¡!
Boris was inspired to build his scammer trap by "Lenny," a chatbot created to create a telemarketer's worst nightmare. When a scammer is sent to the bot they speak with an old man who talks very slowly, is very proud of his family, and can't focus on the telemarketer's goal.
In this video clip below, Lenny eventually drives the scammer crazy:
For years, you have been squinting, licking your fingers, or doing whatever you can do get a really tiny end of a thread into an even tinier hole, and thinking, [infomercial host voice] “THERE'S GOT TO BE A BETTER WAY!”
Well, kids, there is, and you're about to feel both relieved and dumb.
Twitter user John Bick shared a video from a crafting site that went viral for being extremely helpful.
People couldn't believe it. Instead of threading the needle through the hole, shake it down and go from there.
“What type of sorcery is this? https://t.co/uI2jQJAv5l”
"This is what social media should be about. People sharing helpful ideas about what they actually know."
— Atlassheepdog (@atlassheepdog) April 4, 2018
Even GEORGE COSTANZA himself is amazed by this innovation.
GIF from media0.giphy.com.
George Costanza takes a look at it.
This article originally appeared on 06.13.21
Articles
The critical need for ecoliteracy during Earth Month and beyond
Without ecoliteracy, tree-growing initiatives can easily be misconstrued as a panacea and distract from other important work to conserve our environment.
04.21.23
Image via Common Vision
Public school garden in California.Earth Month, while a powerful annual moment for bringing awareness to ecological issues, often falls short of creating year-round commitment to the environment and rarely fosters sustained ecoliteracy. Ecoliteracy, the ability to understand the natural systems that make life on earth possible, is fundamental for producing environmentally-minded decision makers and policies. As we continue to debate the most efficient and productive solutions to climate change, we must boost ecoliteracy to ensure that we are engaged and informed, otherwise we risk implementing poor solutions that create negative consequences.
One potential solution that has been a hot topic in climate change debates has been tree planting. The growing number of tree-planting initiatives and the ensuing controversy in public discourse reinforces the importance of ecoliteracy. Forestation that follows the principles of "right tree, right place, right community" will not only decrease CO2 in our atmosphere, but will also catalyze workforce development, improve water quality, enhance biodiversity, and empower women and girls. As more individuals become ecoliterate, more people understand how proximity to healthy forests makes them healthier, reduces mortality in women, reduces crime, and even helps them realize how their direct economic and social needs are dependent upon the health and vitality of ecosystems around them.
Without ecoliteracy, ecological understanding is a major barrier to public mobilization on issues such as climate change. However, we've found that when citizens engage in activities which build their ecoliteracy, particularly those informed by indigenous wisdom, they learn firsthand the undeniable connections between community health and ecological wellbeing, and fight to conserve, protect and enhance the ecosystems around them.
As an example, Common Vision - a leader in ecologically-based outdoor classroom education in California - is developing ecoliteracy training that catalyzes workforce development. They have cultivated an expert "youth tree corps", a cohort of high school students with Career Technical Education (CTE) training and certification in urban forestry and agroecology. Students travel in vegetable-oil powered buses to plant and prune trees at more than 275 schools throughout the state. Through programs like this, Common Vision has increased California's urban green space by 18 acres, helped sequester 180 tons of greenhouse gases, produced over 100,000 pounds of fresh, organic fruit annually, and engaged over 125,000 students in hands-on tree planting, land stewardship, arts and social justice learning. In addition to growing hundreds of trees, the youth tree corps members will develop their ecoliteracy to help shape a more resilient and ecologically sound future for humanity.
Common Vision's program is not alone, either. Dozens of other tree-planting initiatives with a focus on workforce development have been launched in the last few months. Award-winning singer-songwriter SZA launched Tree Corps with Tazo Tea and American Forests to create a paid tree-planting workforce to reforest BIPOC communities in five major US cities; the Biden-Harris Civilian Climate Corps proposes to train up new workforces to plant millions of trees; and the Tribal Ecosystem Restoration Alliance (TERA) in California has created an innovative partnership with the US Forest Service, private landowners, and tribal entities to create an unprecedented workforce development program to revitalize indigenous knowledge for tending and stewarding existing forests.
Global forest cover has decreased consistently since 2014 but it's clear that through ecoliteracy and increasing the value people place on their surrounding environment, we can combat this critical issue. Further, without ecoliteracy, tree-growing initiatives can easily be misconstrued as a panacea and distract from other important work to conserve our environment.
Image from Trees Water & People.
Indigenous tree planting project, men on hillside.
Ecoliteracy is one of the most effective tools in the toolbox that we have for societal transformation. So I encourage you to make your goal for this Earth Month getting ecoliterate. Whether that's enrolling in a formal ecoliteracy program, turning off your phone and sitting in the park to observe the vitality and resilience of insects, plants and trees, or even planting a tree, find a practice that will help you have a sustained relationship with the natural world. The complexities of the web of relationships of humans with the natural world take a lifetime to learn, but we should all start now. In particular, seek out ecoliteracy programs that elevate indigenous and person-of-color perspectives on ecology like the organizations Cultural Survival, A Growing Culture and Farmer Rishi. The choices humanity is making - from how we grow our food, build our homes, to what our 401ks and savings accounts are funding - are contributing to the climate crisis and it's up to us to gather the knowledge to collectively discover solutions for lasting change. If we build up our ecoliteracy and educate ourselves on the ecology of our individual bioregions, we can protect and preserve our planet and meet our own needs in ways which nourish and repair the ecosystems and human communities around us.
Erin Axelrodis the Project Director for Jonas PhilanthropiesTrees for Climate Health project and a Partner/Worker-Owner at LIFT Economy, helping to accelerate the spread of businesses that benefit our climate, specializing in enterprises that address soil and water regeneration and uplift traditional ecological knowledge. In addition to spearheading Jonas Philanthropies Trees for Climate Health project, the ambitious reforestation initiative working to grow over 10 million trees by 2025, Erin also leads LIFT Economy's regenerative agriculture investor network and a Restorative Ocean Economies Field-Building Initiative. She is a grassroots organizer and an amateur (for love of) ecologist.
Wanda Stewart is the Director of Common Vision and an African American urban farmer, educator and comrade to many in the movement to teach and inspire others to grow themselves, their food and their communities. She believes that cultivating food and medicine, maintaining a healthy being, and living cooperatively are essential skills for our collective survival. To support that learning, growth and healing, she revisits our shared history and trauma, reframing and reclaiming cultural knowledge and heritage while tending the land.
This article originally appeared on 04.21.21.
Articles
Jimmy Fallon asked his viewers if they've ever been caught red-handed. Here’s 17 of the best responses.
You can’t lie about it, you can’t take it back, all you can do is pray for forgiveness.
04.21.23
There is nothing worse than being caught in the act when you're up to no good. You can't lie about it, you can't take it back, all you can do is pray for forgiveness.
“Tonight Show" host Jimmy Fallon asked his viewers if they had ever been caught red-handed and their responses on Twitter were hilarious.
Here are 17 of the funniest and/or most embarrassing Tweets.
"IGotCaught holding a bong. My mom asked what it was and what the weird smell was. I said it was my science project for a new air freshener"
— Lisa Lemon (@mseric) February 15, 2017
"I went to a sex shop with my wife for the first time, the store assistant greeted me with: "nice to see you again!" #IGotCaught"
— Leonardo Grossi (@leonardo_grossi) February 15, 2017
"one time I successfully took a picture of a guy without him noticing. Unfortunately his friend was right behind me. #igotcaught"
— Abby Michael (@flabbymichael) February 15, 2017
This article originally appeared on 06.13.21
Articles
The way a teacher corrected a kid's answer on a quiz has enraged math nerds everywhere.
The teacher was totally being pedantic.
04.21.23
via Imgur
Memories of testing like this gets people fired up.The image below stirred up controversy on Reddit, earning over 10,000 comments.
The story behind the post is a kid was asked to used the “addition strategy” to solve a multiplication problem. The question was 5x3. The student showed their work as 5+5+5, which equals fifteen. That checks out, but the teacher still took away points, writing “3+3+3+3+3.” Which also equals 15.
Does that seem pedantic to you?
Math on a chalkboard.
Does that seem pedantic to you?
Comments seem to be mainly focusing on how pedantic the teacher’s response was, and how it essentially discourages kids from any interest in math they might have. Math is boring and hard enough without being petty.
"What pisses me off is that this is teaching the kid 'Why even bother learning anything in school? Even if I do it right, it's still wrong.'
They’re being prepped for the real world, maybe?"
Culture
Chris Hemsworth's reaction to his daughter wanting a penis deserves a standing ovation.
Nice.
04.20.23
Chris Hemsworth is the 35-year-old star of "Thor: Ragnarok," or you may know him as the brother of equally attractive actor Liam Hemsworth.
But did you know he's also a father-of-three?
Well, he is. And it turns out, he's pretty much the coolest dad ever.
GIF from media4.giphy.com.
Thor likes it.
In a clip from a 2015 interview on "The Ellen DeGeneres Show," Hemsworth shared an interesting conversation he had with his 4-year-old daughter India.
“My daughter's kind of envious of my boys," Hemsworth told Ellen. “She came to me the other day, and she's like 'You know, Papa, I want one of those things that Sasha and Tristan have.' And I'm like, 'What do you mean?' She said, 'You know the things in between their legs that you have.'"
GIF from media3.giphy.com.
Surprise.
Hemsworth said he tried to explain the differences between male and female bodies, but his daughter wasn't having it.
“She goes, 'I really want one!' Hemsworth said. “I'm like, 'A penis?' And she's like, 'I want a penis!'
And then, Hemsworth had the best possible response. He recalls:
She's four and I'm like, 'You know what, you can be whatever you want to be.' And she goes, 'Thanks, Dad.' Runs off into the playground and that was it.
And then, I cannot confirm, but I'm pretty sure the Ellen audience did this:
GIF from media3.giphy.com.
Standing ovation.
Major kudos to Hemsworth for taking a potentially awkward parenting situation and turning it into a lesson about love and acceptance.
You can watch the full clip here:
Articles
Men kept mistaking her kindness for flirting, so she asked the internet for advice. It delivered.
You’ve got to “own your own ‘no.’ ”
04.20.23
There's a dilemma women face that most men will never understand.
When a woman is nice to a man she has just met, they often misconstrue her kindness for a sign of sexual attraction.
A study published in Psychological Science found that men who are shown pictures of women misidentify their body language and facial expressions as sexually suggestive 12% of the time.
This poses a huge problem for women in customer service.
Easy tiger.
Reddit user XochiquetzalRose is having such a problem with men misinterpreting hr kindness for flirting, she asked the online forum for help:
"I work at a grocery store. I have excellent customer service and im really empathetic. Im kind and i try to make every 30 second - 5 minute interaction with a person a good experience for them…
I'm starting to feel a little upset though because some of my regular men... older, sick, sad... have become too comfortable with me. They needed a kind ear but now they seem to feel it means more. They make comments about going out, or do i have a boyfriend or “nothing sexual" but…"can we be friends, can i have your number?" When i know the “nothing sexual" isn't their true intention.
It hurts my feelings because, can't i just be kind? Can't we just be humans in this together? Why must it turn down that path...
Do any of you experience these sort of interactions? I don't want to close myself off from being an empathetic person, but the way the tides have been turning... it's becoming exhausting."
The post was a huge hit on Reddit attracting nearly 2,000 responses in the first 16 hours. More importantly, it provides some great advice for women who want to be kind to men but don't want them to think they're are being flirtatious.
Here are the 11 best responses:
1.Ga_x:
"I’m very much like you, but I don’t work in retail anymore (thank god). My optimistic take on it, is to be honest and gentle. 'I’m flattered but I don’t give out my number. Thank you for the compliment though!'
If you want, you can hide behind imaginary boyfriends, or store policy, or not owning a phone, etc. But for me, owning my right to say no, without needing an excuse or an apology was very liberating.
You don’t owe them anything. You don’t even owe them a thank you for hitting on you. ( I only say thanks when the person is really polite and it genuinely flatters me) . And if it seems daunting at first, practice what you’d say in front of a mirror, say the words aloud and listen how it sounds. Find phrases you like and repeat them until you own them.
There’s no need to compromise.
Edit: spacing + when I say gentle, I mean at first, and for those polite and genuine. If someone insists, you can tell them you’ve already answered, and they should respect that, and don’t hesitate to call them out on their harassment. Being nice and being meek are two very different things."
2.ughsicles:
"God, this is so real. I never realized how important this was until recently. I had a stalkery guy who would NOT leave after a party, even though my friends insisted he leave ahead of them. He lurked outside my apartment and called and texted asking if he could come back up. I told him all manner of "No." Said I wasn't interested. Told him to go home. Until eventually I gave up and texted, in response to his repeated calls
'I can't pick up the phone because I'm on the phone with my BOYFRIEND.'
At the time, it was a lie (although I currently am dating the guy I was on the phone with lol). But he went away. I was SO PISSED that that's what it took. And that he unquestioningly accepted another man's dominion over me, when he wouldn't accept a simple, "I'm not interested." Guh, it still chaps me.”
3.dsmith1994:
"I worked in retail for most of my years in college. I started as a cashier and eventually moved into a stocking position. I worked in a resort community where there were many older people who were usually rude, acting like taking to you was a waste of their time.
Well while working there I was touched and awkwardly hit on almost weekly. I helped someone out to their car and they called me cute the entire time and asked me to get in their car. I had someone offer me a tip try to put in my pocket and then played with me while their hand was in my pocket. I was probably 17 for this one. My ass has been slapped, chest rubbed, and crotch grabbed multiple times. So I understand where everyone is coming from. The only difference is, I’m a man and had older women do all of this to me. I told my management about it and they usually laughed saying 'your a guy get over it’.”
4.moolight:
"And it's funny, even when you decline politely they'll try to turn it around on you and make you the bad guy. I was having a drink and reading alone recently when a man came up to me and asked me if I smoked/offered a cigarette.
Me: "No, I do not, but thanks"
Him: "Oh, well can I can sit down with you and talk?"
Me: "I'm really focused on my reading right now, and don't feel like talking. I appreciate the offer though, you can even sit here to smoke if you want."
Him: "...Well fine. I figured you'd want the company"
Guy was flustered walked away for a bit, but made to sure to get my attention as he left, "I'm going to enjoy that cigarette now!"
Me: "...Okay!"
Obviously not the worst interaction in the world, but definitely made me chuckle how entitled this guy felt to talk to me."
"I have 'The Look' I give guys who can’t or won’t take a polite no. I can’t always control it, but I try to use it as a last resort. Years ago I was working retail and a customer was being an arse, and I looked away from him and The Look slipped out while I was looking in the direction of a friend. She saw The Look and ducked!! After the arse left she came over and asked why I was so mad at her."
6.madge_pie:
"Goodness, you could have been writing this for me. I work with the public and have a lot of regular customers too (banking) and I always try to get to know people a little bit. I'm in my mid 30's and have a lot of older men start to become inappropriate after I've been kind to them. I have learned to curb their unwanted behavior to a degree and still be able to keep them smiling. I started replying with some semi-sarcastic come backs and they usually don't know what to say. Example
Old man : you sure look nice today
Me : thank you
Old man : and you're always so sweet to me! (this is where I can sense it's gonna shift to being inappropriate)
Me : well, being helpful and happy is why (Bank name) pays me!
I know it's kind of stupid, but it changes the conversation and makes it harder for them to continue down their path. Just remain firm in saying no to their requests for 'friendship' and phone number requests. (when I get asked for my phone number I write down the bank number and say, you can reach me here!) Good luck, OP. Don't let the pervs get you down.”
7.Newsdwarf:
"I worked in retail and feel your pain OP. It got to the point where I had to be walked to my car after shifts as male customers would wait outside for me. It was horrible.
It's retail. My job involved being nice. You want a block of cheese, here it is + a smile and "hope you enjoy it, thanks for shopping with us". You want a lottery ticket? Here it is + "hope it's a lucky one for you, have a great evening". You want to tell me your dog died? "I'm so sorry to hear that. He had such a wonderful time with you, and I do believe in the Rainbow Bridge".
I give the same service, and same chat, to all customers. Yet the amount of men that latched onto it as "she smiled and said have a nice day, she must want to fuck me".
Approaches went from nervous "I really like you, will go out with me?" and phone numbers scribbled on receipts, right through to stalkers waiting after my shifts.
There were the ones that would hold back until no other customers were around so they "could have you all to myself" and the ones that waited for the queues so they could announce ownership of me.
I loved my job, but too many male customers treated me like a whore. Like their purchase of a packet of fags bought them the right to have no boundaries with me. Really unhappy memories."
8.phishstorm:
"I worked at a grocery store and I’d get so pissed if men did this. There is absolutely NOTHING appropriate about a 50+ year old dude hitting on someone in their 20s. It’s disgusting, entitled, and beyond creepy.
As soon as they’d do it, I would become extremely cold to them. They want to make me uncomfortable? I’ll make them feel every bit as awkward as I do.
And then they would hit on the fucking underage baggers who were usually 16. That would really send me into a rage, I always wanted to call them out for pedophillia. Disgusting.”
9.HalfMoonSky:
"Hotel industry. This post has sparked a rant here, and I'm sorry. The gist is I relate so very much to this.
Helping a man in his late 40s? find a steak house for him and his friend has lead to a confession of love (I'm an idiot for giving out my number; he kinda tricked me and I fell for it). A shuttle drive to the airport lead to a guy constantly asking for dates (he gave his business card, I thought for a job opportunity).
I actually just gave my PSN after chatting video games and mentioning I cant find a competitive group for R6 Siege and am now realizing that this is probably a bad idea. Shit. I also just got a business card for what I thought is another job opp but this may also be a bad idea. Shit.
I think I'm I guess nieve? Because I try to be nice to everyone since most my life many werent nice to me... and I keep thinking that folks arent shitty just to be proved wrong time and time again. Yet I keep hoping for good in this world. I really need to not give out my information regardless of circumstances. I'm just desperate for actual friendship. And because I'm relatable, mildly attractive, a nerd and a fitness freak, it always always turns into this weird fucking affinity for me where I'm now "theirs" somehow? As if checking them in and handing them roomkey cards makes me somehow their future wife.
But it's also my job to be nice to folks. I'm not flirting, I'm moderately terrified of the idea of being alone with a man again, I'm just tryin to make their hotel stay start off with a smile. And yet, chatting about work woes or making a laugh or two or helping find stuff to do in the city (read: starting that smile) makes someone think I'm out to date them even when I explicitly say I'm not, I dont, I dont want to.
The worst is if I explain that I'm transgender. It either gets worse as I am no longer woman but now a fuck object that they have to have physically or it gets worse because I am now disgusting and they werent actually interested in me and I'm a piece of garbage that needs to kill myself. Like, look I've tried. Believe me, I want to. It didnt work, and now I feel like shit for being nice to a psychopath that didnt take a hint that's gonna ruin my life for a while.
... sorry. I relate to this post on the deepest of levels."
10.mfball:
"I think you can give good customer service and then immediately detach to continue doing whatever other work you can find so that they don't have as much of a chance to monopolize your attention and create a narrative of friendship (or more) in their heads. I work as a barista and can see the potential for this issue in some of my customers, especially because my coffee bar isn't usually super busy so there's often time to talk to individual customers for several minutes if I feel like it. The second things start to feel overly familiar or sketchy in any way, it's "well hey, have a good one, gotta get back to work!" or whatever and without giving them an opportunity to answer, I start cleaning something, answering the phone, stocking supplies, etc. It sucks that people take basic human kindness the wrong way sometimes, but that's the unfortunate reality we're living in, so it makes sense to protect yourself where you can by withdrawing from the people you can see becoming problematic.”
11.purplelephant:
"Yes.
Although I’m a stripper. But every single night I work without a doubt, a customer asks for my number or for me to go home with them. I too am incredibly kind and love to talk and flirt and listen to people’s problems. But you’d think that men would realize I’m working when I’m interacting with them. NOPE! They want to take me home, they say “we have a special connection”.. it doesn’t matter how old too. I’ve gotten this reaction from men in their mid 30’s to old ass dudes too, and I’m only 25! It’s really kinda sad to me when this happens because even though I’m a nice and personable stripper, they don’t seem to realize I’m doing this for their money."
This article originally appeared on 09.21.18