Lifestyle

A College Student Sent Her Crush An Impressive PowerPoint On Why He Should Date Her

by Penn Collins

April 20, 2017

Sure, attraction is normally a fickle, subjective phenomenon that is often impervious to stone cold logic and analysis. 

But that doesn’t mean a girl shouldn’t try, does it? 

Lizzy Fenton thought it was worth a shot, especially considering, as you’ll see, her impressive knack for both slideshow creation and analytical thinking. The student sent her crush, Carter, a full-on presentation explaining why dating her would be a good idea on a number of levels. She shared her work product with the internet via Twitter, and the consensus seems to be that Lizzy makes a strong case for herself. 

Here we go: 

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Simple. Honest. Direct. 

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A simple photograph to humanize the subject of the presentation. Good thinking, Lizzie. 

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With these two slides, she poses a problem, knowing full well she’s the solution. Salesmanship 101. 

She also uses the bottom slide to sell her versatility. Practical. 

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You can’t argue with numbers. And if you’re more of a visual learner, there’s both an intuitive line graph and a simple two-figure flow chart. Based on this well-presented data, there’s little question that her boobs will continue to grow over time. This may prove to be a double-edged sword, especially with the projection they will reach the size of a human head by 2025 (but that’s a matter of taste). Numbers don’t lie. Especially when they’re presented via regression analysis and a line of best fit. The girl knows her stats. 

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She then touts her stability, with the glaring qualifier that it only covers financial matters. While she may not be highly liquid herself (Figure 2), she’s an ambitious worker (Figure 1) with reliable access to capital should the need for cash arise (Figure 3). What about general stability, Lizzy? Emotional stability? I guess you’ll need to ask her out, Carter, to get an answer. 

In fact, even if the presentation comes up short and Carter doesn’t bite, she’ll always have a loving, supportive partner in … the Microsoft Corporation:

While it wasn’t included in the presentation, she’s also a hell of a barista, capable of making intricate leaf designs that actually look a bit like … well, we’re back to boobs again. 

No word on Carter’s response to the proposal, but, c’mon dude. Date Lizzy. She seems cool. 

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A College Student Sent Her Crush An Impressive PowerPoint On Why He Should Date Her