A Liberal's Letter to Conservatives: Why Democrats Need You More Than Ever

Dear Conservatives,

Wow. Well that sucked, didn’t it?

I know how you’re feeling, and I don’t mean that in a condescending, mock-sympathy, shoulder-rub way. I really do. On a brisk November night in 2004 I lit a candle at my college’s chapel and despaired precisely the way you are now. I remember all too well that pit of dread in my stomach and the disbelieving heat flushing my cheeks. I get it, I really do, and I’m sorry about that. Kind of.

Now it’s the days after. All us liberals are walking around with huge grins, holding doors for people, and being all cheery and spry. Even our hangovers taste sweet.

Despite all this, the election produced some very good news for you.

What is it? That the Republican Party—in its current form—is dead. Its heart monitor is screaming “BEEEEEEEE” in flatline and no matter how hard you pound on its chest you’re not bringing it back to life. Step back from the gurney, wipe the sweat from your brow, look at your watch and call it: time of death, 1:50 p.m., November 6, 2012. Why is this good news?

Yesterday’s Republican Party had become diseased with anachronistic, extremist, jingoistic, and xenophobic ideology. It was infected by the Tea Party, the religious right, and the Koch Brothers. The Party was no longer the moderate, dignified, intellectual conservatism of yore, championed by well-educated members of the middle class. It had mutated into the party of people who protest outside post offices with handwritten protest signs declaring Obama a Muslim “socalist” and that English should be our official “langauguage.” In short, your Grand Old Party poisoned its grand old self.

Do not mourn its passing though. The death of yesterday’s Republican Party was necessary to ensure tomorrow’s Republican Party is a viable political movement for the future. That movement must embody fiscal—not social—conservatism, small egalitarian government, and responsible free markets. Lastly and most importantly, base your political ideology on solid data, statistics, and reason, NOT fear, jingoism, and bigotry.

Look to sane conservatives—the Log Cabin Republicans, the Megan McCains, the John Hunstmans, even the Chris Christies. Approach political discourse like adults, not petulant children. Leave religion and your Bible totally and completely out of it—as per your favorite document, the U.S. Constitution.

The right-wing blogs are aflutter—this country is doomed, they say. America just died. In a sense, they’re right. The country they wanted, their ideal America, the country of backwards social policies where gay weddings will ruin your marriage and weed is bad mkay and women can’t look after their own bodies and anybody with dark skin is probably stealing shit be it TVs or jobs—that bizarre notion of America is dead.

What these people don’t get, and what they’ll never get, is that America’s laws and politics should always reflect the desires of the majority of its populace, and the majority of its populace isn't interested in their version of America.

These people will never adapt to the changing times. They will prop up the party’s corpse and scream louder, spittle flying as they rage about the death of our Constitution, the sanctity of marriage, of God’s rape-given gifts. They will insist “Obama Hussein’s” reelection means WAR, dammit, REVOLUTION. When this happens—and it already is—here’s what you do:

Tell them to Fuck. Right. Off.

Why am I telling you this? Why tip my liberal hand and give you advice? Because we—the Democrats—we need you.

I know, that sounds weird. The liberals reading this just choked on their soy lattes. But I’m serious. We need a reasonable counterpoint, an opposing view, a dissenting opinion. When you challenge our ideas with sound argument it will force us to make them stronger. The arguments of yesterday’s Republican Party were not sound, and the electorate knew it. Democrats didn’t so much win this election as the GOP lost it.

If you want to stick to your old ideology, we liberals take great pleasure in thumping you again. If you don’t think we can, remember you’ve lost the popular vote five out of the last six elections, and your demographic is only getting worse.

So please. Realize that yesterday’s Republican Party sucked. Light its funeral pyre and say a few words as it burns. Then from its ashes, rebuild it to the respectable party it once was.

Much love, if you can believe it,

Your (liberal) fellow American

Image (cc) flickr user eliduke

via Alan Levine / Flickr

The World Health Organization is hoping to drive down the cost of insulin by encouraging more generic drug makers to enter the market.

The organization hopes that by increasing competition for insulin, drug manufacturers will be forced to lower their prices.

Currently, only three companies dominate the world insulin market, Eli Lilly, Novo Nordisk and Sanofi. Over the past three decades they've worked to drastically increase the price of the drug, leading to an insulin availability crisis in some places.

In the United States, the price of insulin has increased from $35 a vial to $275 over the past two decades.

Keep Reading Show less

Oh, irony. You are having quite a day.

The Italian region of Veneto, which includes the city of Venice, is currently experiencing historic flooding. Venice Mayor Luigi Brugnaro has stated that the flooding is a direct result of climate change, with the tide measuring the highest level in 50 years. The city (which is actually a collection of 100 islands in a lagoon—hence its famous canal streets), is no stranger to regular flooding, but is currently on the brink of declaring a state of emergency as waters refuse to recede.

Keep Reading Show less
The Planet

Since the International Whaling Commission banned commercial whaling in 1986, whale populations have been steadily recovering. However, whales in the wild still face other dangers. In the summer of 2018, four Russian companies that supply aquariums with marine animals captured almost 100 beluga whales and killer whales (aka orcas). After a public outcry, those whales are swimming free as the last of the captive whales have been released, the first time this many captured whales have been released back into the wild.

In late 2018 and early 2019, a drone captured footage of 11 orcas and 87 beluga whales crammed into holding pens in the Srednyaya Bay. The so-called "whale jail" made headlines, and authorities began to investigate their potentially illegal capture.

Keep Reading Show less
The Planet
via Twitter / Bye,Bye Harley Davidson

The NRA likes to diminish the role that guns play in fatal shootings by saying, "Guns don't kill people, people kill people."

Which is the same logic as, "Hammers don't build roofs, people build roofs." No duh. But it'd be nearly impossible to build a roof without a hammer.

So, shouldn't the people who manufacture guns share some responsibility when they are used for the purpose they're made: killing people? Especially when the manufacturers market the weapon for that exact purpose?

Keep Reading Show less
via Gage Skidmore / Flickr

The 2020 election is a year away, but Donald Trump has some serious ground to cover if he doesn't want it to be a historical blowout.

A Washington Post- ABC News poll released Tuesday shows that Trump loses by double digits to the top Democratic contenders.

Vice President Joe Biden (56%-39%); Sen. Elizabeth Warren of Massachusetts (54%-39%); Sen. Bernie Sanders of Vermont (56%-39%); South Bend, Indiana, Mayor Pete Buttigieg (52%-41%); and Sen. Kamala Harris of California (52%-41%) all have big leads over the president.

Keep Reading Show less