Culture

Why Sexual Consent Is Just like Offering Someone a Cup of Tea

by Isis Madrid

March 11, 2015

Ever get the feeling that some people are simply too dense to understand that consent is necessary when sex is on the table? Do you ever suspect that some dummies can’t even seem to grasp the concept of consent? Fear not, blogger Rockstar Dinosaur Pirate Princess has a solution for the neurologically and morally disadvantaged. Just imagine that sex is tea and you are offering someone a cup of tea!

Image by CoCreatr via Creative Commons

She addresses saying yes:

“If you’re still struggling, just imagine instead of initiating sex, you’re making them a cup of tea,” she suggests. “You say “hey, would you like a cup of tea?” and they go “omg fuck yes, I would fucking LOVE a cup of tea! Thank you!*” then you know they want a cup of tea.”

Saying no:

“If they say “No thank you” then don’t make them tea. At all. Don’t make them tea, don’t make them drink tea, don’t get annoyed at them for not wanting tea. They just don’t want tea, ok?”

The fact that people are allowed to change their minds:

“They might say “Yes please, that’s kind of you” and then when the tea arrives they actually don’t want the tea at all. Sure, that’s kind of annoying as you’ve gone to the effort of making the tea, but they remain under no obligation to drink the tea. They did want tea, now they don’t. Sometimes people change their mind in the time it takes to boil that kettle, brew the tea and add the milk. And it’s ok for people to change their mind, and you are still not entitled to watch them drink it even though you went to the trouble of making it.”

And of course, unconscious people should never drink tea. Ever:

“If they are unconscious, don’t make them tea. Unconscious people don’t want tea and can’t answer the question “do you want tea” because they are unconscious.”

Read more here.

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Why Sexual Consent Is Just like Offering Someone a Cup of Tea