What a Kanye West Presidency Would Look Like

A semi-serious look at an are-you-serious candidate.

Image via YouTube

We’re only a couple months into election season, but already, the race feels like a seriously scary drug trip. From a leading presidential contender who has no political experience and refers to Mexicans as “rapists,” to the contingent of candidates who want to repeal the 14thamendment (you know, the one that passed 147 years ago), this election has proved that pretty much anyone in any stage of language acquisition can run for the highest office in the land and actually, heroically, get votes. When Kanye West announced at the VMAs that he would be running for president in 2020, many people applauded—but the world couldn’t quite tell if he was joking.

The reasonable people’s consensus is that he was kidding, but still, his announcement is worth considering. After all, politics is the only job where “job experience” is seen as a liability, not an asset, and his name recognition couldn’t be stronger. What would a Kanye presidency look like? Let’s take an outrageously hypothetical look.

On education: Increased funding for after-school programming, with a special focus on underserved youth. From: “We Don’t Care:” “You know the kids gonna act a fool/When you stop the programs for after-school/And they DCFS, some of ‘em dyslexic/They favorite 50 Cent song is “20 questions.”

On LGBT Rights: Pro gay marriage, pro anti-discrimination laws, and pro-Caitlyn Jenner (at least).

On diplomacy: He has other strengths.

On minimum-wage laws: Supports a substantial increase in the minimum wage/living wage laws, as well as reparations for rappers?

On mass incarceration and police brutality: Dismantle the prison-industrial complex, now. “Where I’m from the dope boys is the rock stars/But they can’t cop cars without seeing cop cars/I guess they want us all behind bars—I know it.”

On AIDS Research and Funding: Takes a strong, insane stand against imaginary government agents who infect everyday citizens with AIDS.

On Hurricane Katrina: Ten years later, still a disaster.

On the subject of Kanye: Pretty much a beautiful immortal genius/gift from God?

Not everyone will agree with Kanye’s politics, although it should be noted that most of his views are in line with mainstream American values, and the majority are grounded in pretty reasonable reason. Food, for some really strange thought.

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