GOOD

Six Qualities of a Wonderful Friendship

You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.


“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”—Jim Rohn

If you haven’t heard this famous quote by Jim Rohn yet, then now you have something new to work with. Let that sink in for a second. You’re the average of the five people you spend most of your time with. Of course, that’s not an absolute rule, but it’s a general guideline.

It makes sense then, to surround yourself with a close circle of friends that are positive influencers. The people close to me are supportive, driven, and brilliant. I like to think their admirable qualities have rubbed off on me.

When I have a venture I want to pursue, they don’t just nod and say, “Uh-huh. Okay.” I’m sure there are plenty of people out there who would respond to their friends with disinterest. Instead, my friends are curious, and hungry to learn more. Then they’re excited. Finally, they push me.

My point is, you should be closely considering the friends whom you spend the most time with. Are they great influences on you?

There is a large difference between a “convenience friendship” and a genuine friendship. The former is because you’ve settled and that’s not always a good idea (if ever.) Meanwhile, the latter is always something worth pursuing more of.

With this in mind, here are six ways you can tell if you have a wonderful friendship:

1. You’re constantly learning from one another.

Amazing bonds are like a two-way mentorship. You teach the other, the other teaches you. There’s this hunger for growth and who better to learn from than your best friends? 

Imagine having several two-way mentorships. How could you possibly stagnate as a person with such a system? 


2. You strive to grow more like them.

Many things about them amaze you. Perhaps it’s the way they carry themselves or how they seem to connect with everything you say. Whatever the reason is, you want to be more like them because there’s a charming quality there. You can’t always pinpoint what it is, but you just know that being more like them wouldn’t be so bad.



After all, you started your friendship with these people for a reason right? If you don’t want to be like your friends then you should sit down and contemplate whether this is a genuine friendship or just a convenient one. 


3. You’re glad to be seen with them.

Oh man, when you are walking with them you want the world to see you together. It’s like being seen with the most attractive person on earth. These friends would be people you’d love your family to know. Speaking of family…


4. They’re your (second) family.

Have you ever had a friend who would come to your house and call your parents “Mom” and “Dad?” Some people may think this is weird, but it’s because they’re 100 percent comfortable with you. You’re related to them by extension. They’re basically your brothers and sisters.


5. They know how you think (and how to respond to you.)

After spending a lot of time with someone, you’re bound to figure out the subtle details that make someone unique. They know how to respond to your mood and they know what you wouldn’t like. 

Other people who know how you are wouldn’t necessarily care. Your true friends do, of course.


6. They listen completely.

Everyone is constantly fighting for the spotlight during a conversation. Active listening is a lost art where speaking is in higher demand. Your close friends know how to listen with intention and really hear every word that comes out of your mouth.

After reading this, do you feel like you have a valuable group of friends? If so, cherish them because you’re lucky. There are many people out there who are struggling to find others they can connect with. If you don’t feel like you’ve surrounded yourself with wonderful friendships, then I challenge you to start going out to meet people whenever you can. Explore new hobbies, join a Meetup, start a club! Clicking on a genuine level is hard so it take intention. And make sure you don’t settle for convenience friendships.

Friend image via Shutterstock

Articles
via Real Time with Bill Maher / YouTube and The Late Late Show with James Corden / YouTube

A controversial editorial on America's obesity epidemic and healthcare by comedian Bill Maher on his HBO show "Real Time" inspired a thoughtful, and funny, response by James Cordon. It also made for a great debate about healthcare that Americans are avoiding.

At the end of the September 6th episode of "Real Time, " Maher turned to the camera for his usual editorial and discussed how obesity is a huge part of the healthcare debate that no one is having.

"At Next Thursday's debate, one of the candidates has to say, 'The problem with our healthcare system is Americans eat shit and too much of it.' All the candidates will mention their health plans but no one will bring up the key factor: the citizens don't lift a finger to help," Maher said sternly.

Keep Reading Show less
Politics

There is no shortage of proposals from the, um, what's the word for it… huge, group of Democratic presidential candidates this year. But one may stand out from the pack as being not just bold but also necessary; during a CNN town hall about climate change Andrew Yang proposed a "green amendment" to the constitution.

Keep Reading Show less
test
Me Too Kit

The creator of the Me Too kit — an at home rape kit that has yet to hit the market — has come under fire as sexual assault advocates argue the kit is dangerous and misleading for women.

The kit is marketed as "the first ever at home kit for commercial use," according to the company's website. "Your experience. Your kit. Your story. Your life. Your choice. Every survivor has a story, every survivor has a voice." Customers will soon be able order one of the DIY kits in order to collect evidence "within the confines of the survivor's chosen place of safety" after an assault.

"With MeToo Kit, we are able to collect DNA samples and other tissues, which upon testing can provide the necessary time-sensitive evidence required in a court of law to identify a sexual predator's involvement with sexual assault," according to the website.

Keep Reading Show less
Health

Villagers rejoice as they receive the first vaccines ever delivered via drone in the Congo

The area's topography makes transporting medicines a treacherous task.

Photo by Henry Sempangi Senyule

When we discuss barriers to healthcare in the developed world, affordability is commonly the biggest concern. But for some in the developing world, physical distance and topography can be the difference between life and death.

Widjifake, a hard-to-reach village in northwestern Democratic Republic of Congo (DRC) with a population of 6,500, struggles with having consistent access to healthcare supplies due to the Congo River and its winding tributaries.

It can take up to three hours for vehicles carrying supplies to reach the village.

Keep Reading Show less
Health
via Keith Boykin / Twitter

Fox News and President Trump seem like they may be headed for a breakup. "Fox is a lot different than it used to be," Trump told reporters in August after one of the network's polls found him trailing for Democrats in the 2020 election.

"There's something going on at Fox, I'll tell you right now. And I'm not happy with it," he continued.

Some Fox anchors have hit back at the president over his criticisms. "Well, first of all, Mr. President, we don't work for you," Neil Cavuto said on the air. "I don't work for you. My job is to cover you, not fawn over you or rip you, just report on you."

Keep Reading Show less
Politics