Could You Survive the Home Alone Traps?

This holiday season, if you’re looking for a grim fantasy of torture and retribution, pop in Home Alone. By the time you’re done reading this, you’ll understand the dark truth of the charming ‘90s classic: all those hijinks and booby-traps would kill an intruder several times over, in spectacularly grisly fashion.

Vsauce’s Jake Roper is the twisted genius behind the discovery (which sort of has lurked in our hearts since the day we first saw Macaulay Culkin repel his clueless assailants). His verdict? “Turns out, the doorknob is substantially more dangerous to Kevin and the safety of the home than it would be to the bandits as the temperatures needed to transfer enough heat to the outside knob would likely first melt the door or at least set it on fire,” Nerdist explains.

It goes downhill from there: “The crowbar to the chest would have sent Harry to the morgue since the recreated blow would have punctured his lungs and heart, but that’s inconsequential as Kevin McCallister would have have already murdered both of them with the paint can trap.

“The impact from a swinging paint can is absolutely devastating and, as shown in Roper’s video, would nearly knock your head off of your shoulders.”

Watch the whole thing, ya filthy animal.