How to Politely Refuse a Plastic Bag

This flyer by the fashion illustrator Julia Durgee offers tongue-in-cheek responses you can employ when a store clerk tries to give you a plastic bag that you don't want, and which will contribute to the planet's ruin.

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I'm a "no thanks" kind of girl, but these options are cute regardless. What do you say when you're given one?Thanks, Jessa!