On November 19, 2011 Babak Rafati, was scheduled to referee a match in Germany’s top soccer league in front of 50,000 fans. But he never showed. Without a ref, officials canceled the match and went looking for Rafati. They found him in his hotel bathroom, unconscious from a suicide attempt.
In an interview with the Swiss newspaper Blick, Rafati has now opened up about how the pressures of refereeing on one of sports’ biggest stages consumed him and that he was plagued by depression and thoughts of suicide in the aftermath of his attempt. But an unlikely source—one of the league’s biggest stars—offered him words of comfort at his lowest point. “Bastian Schweinsteiger wrote me a letter, which touched me very much. There was zero calculation,” Rafati said.
“Mr. Rafati, you often fall in life. You have to get up often. I wish you all the best,” wrote Schweinsteiger, who, played for Germany’s top team Bayern München at the time and was also a member of Germany’s 2014 World Cup-winning team. The 32-year-old midfielder now plays for Manchester United.
It was “a terribly great human gesture. But depression is still a big taboo in football,” Rafati said. So instead of returning to officiating, he has committed himself to helping soccer players deal with depression, counseling some directly. He’s also speaking about his own experience with depression to become an advocate for mental health in sports.
And he says his time in therapy has greatly helped him, saying he no longer thinks of suicide. “Life is too good to destroy itself.”
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Grieving couple comforting each other
This response to someone grieving a friend might be the best internet comment ever
When someone is hit with the sudden loss of a friend or loved one, words rarely feel like enough. Yet, more than a decade ago, a wise Redditor named GSnow shared thoughts so profound they still bring comfort to grieving hearts today.
Originally posted around 2011, the now-famous reply was rediscovered when Upvoted, an official Reddit publication, featured it again to remind everyone of its enduring truth. It began as a simple plea for help: “My friend just died. I don't know what to do.”
What followed was a piece of writing that many consider one of the internet’s best comments of all time. It remains shared across social media, grief forums, and personal messages to this day because its honesty and metaphor speak to the raw reality of loss and the slow, irregular path toward healing.
Below is GSnow’s full reply, unchanged, in all its gentle, wave-crashing beauty:
Why this advice still matters
Mental health professionals and grief counselors often describe bereavement in stages or phases, but GSnow’s “wave theory” gives an image more relatable for many. Rather than a linear process, grief surges and retreats—sometimes triggered by a song, a place, or a simple morning cup of coffee.
In recent years, this metaphor has found renewed relevance. Communities on Reddit, TikTok, and grief support groups frequently reshare it to help explain the unpredictable nature of mourning.
Many readers say this analogy helps them feel less alone, giving them permission to ride each wave of grief rather than fight it.
Finding comfort in shared wisdom
Since this comment first surfaced, countless people have posted their own stories underneath it, thanking GSnow and passing the words to others facing fresh heartbreak. It’s proof that sometimes, the internet can feel like a global support group—strangers linked by shared loss and hope.
For those searching for more support today, organizations like The Dougy Center, GriefShare, and local bereavement groups offer compassionate resources. If you or someone you know is struggling with intense grief, please reach out to mental health professionals who can help navigate these deep waters.
When grief comes crashing like the ocean, remember these words—and hang on. There is life between the waves.
This article originally appeared four years ago.