As McDonald’s continues to lose market share, it’s straying further and further from its burger-and-fries foundation to break away from the stigma surrounding mass-produced fast food. Sometimes this means salads, more exotic offerings, or in-house cafés.

Sometimes it means just using some razzle-dazzle to get people talking about the golden arches again. To that end, McDonald’s has grabbed some Can you believe this? headlines with the tongue in cheek infomercialesque introduction of the “frork.”

A fork (I guess) for french fries.

Why would someone require a utensil to eat fries, perhaps the most finger-friendly food there is?

I’m not going to answer that. I’ll let the folks at Mickey D’s field that one in this campy video:

Lest you think this is all parody, the frork will be appearing and available in stores on May 5 only. McDonald’s is in on the joke, as is clear from the use of celebrity pitchman Anthony Sullivan to introduce the item, stating, "The topping dropping ... Wait. Is this a real problem? Probably not. But good news: We solved it anyway!"

It’s not a real problem, obviously, but this bizarre ploy has many wondering why McDonald’s is essentially goofing off rather than addressing actual problems customers experience.

McDonald’s, you will never be cool and edgy. I’m sorry, but it’s true. You’re McDonald’s. Just fix your ice cream machines, apparently.

Nonetheless, if you do want one of these (you don’t), you can actually call 1-844-McD-FRORK to get yours.