In 1969, while astronauts Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin made their historic Moon landing, another figure quietly made history. As the world watched Apollo 11, Michael Collins, the mission's third astronaut, orbited the Moon alone, earning the title “the loneliest man in history," per Express. Collins documented his solitary journey in haunting notes, revealing his thoughts and emotions during the mission.
Image Source: The crew members of NASA's Apollo 11 mission pose for a group portrait. From left to right, Neil Armstrong, Michael Collins, and Edwin 'Buzz' Aldrin Jr. (Photo by Space Frontiers/Getty Images)
Collins expressed his fear of returning to Earth alone if the mission failed. While waiting for news of the landing, he compared his stress to that of a "nervous bride." He wrote, “My secret terror for the last six months has been leaving them on the Moon and returning to Earth alone; now I am within minutes of finding out the truth of the matter. If they fail to rise from the surface or crash back into it, I am not going to commit suicide; I am coming home, forthwith, but I will be a marked man for life and I know it,” Collins wrote.
Image Source: Apollo 11 astronauts (L to R): Buzz Aldrin, Lunar Module Pilot; Neil Armstrong, Lunar Module Cmdr.; and Michael Collins, Command Module Pilot
Going forward in his journey alone while Aldrin and Armstrong had each other for support surely felt upsetting. It is one of the striking feelings that Collins noted in his book “Carrying the Fire: An Astronaut’s Journey.” The astronaut, in his note, mentioned, “I am alone now, truly alone, and isolated from any known life. I am it. If a count were taken, the score would be three billion plus two over on the other side of the Moon, and one plus God knows what on this side.” Sharing more about his experience and everything that surrounded it, Collins revealed that the journey was challenging but worth it, per 60 Minutes Australia.
Image Source: Apollo 11 astronauts the day after their successful splashdown in the Pacific. LTR: Neil Armstrong, Buzz Aldrin, and Michael Collins.
"Did I have the best seat on Apollo 11? No. Was I happy with the seat I did have? Yes – I was, and to be any small part of that suited me very, very well. And, besides, I was their ticket home – they couldn't get home without me,” he mentioned. Though Collins wasn’t given the fame and popularity as Armstrong and Aldrin, he still was a crucial part of the mission and that is a win he’s always acknowledged. It was also mentioned that while the duo impressively collected rocks and explored the moon, Collins was refined to the command module.
Image Source: American former astronaut and test pilot Michael Collins on March 16, 2019 in New York City. (Photo by Omar Vega/Getty Images)
Collins experienced 47 minutes of pitch-black darkness and loneliness. He remarked, "The food was terrible, but I enjoyed my time behind the moon, it's a more rugged place and not a very comfortable place,” he explained. Collins expressed his blissful love for his planet Earth despite being on the moon and how its “center stage” and magnificent “blue” caught his eye even more from space. “The moon was impressive but even after being so close to it, it was nothing compared to our home planet,” he added.