She was the first mom among her friends—and it changed everything

Becoming a parent is challenging enough, but when you're the first in your social circle to have a child, the difficulty multiplies. Without a built-in support network of friends who've already walked that path, first-time parenting can feel like navigating unknown territory. TikTok creator @thereal.becca recently highlighted these unsung heroes—the "first moms"—and her message deeply resonated online.

In a heartfelt TikTok video that's been viewed by tens of thousands, Becca describes her own experience of early motherhood and the isolation she initially felt. Her baby is just six weeks old, yet she's already keenly aware of the unique challenges and pressures faced by those who lead the way.

"You are so impressive to me," Becca says, directly addressing first moms everywhere.

  A group of moms and their childrenCanva

These pioneering mothers, as Becca points out, have no existing group chats full of parenting tips. They're typically awake alone at 3 a.m., questioning whether sleep schedules and diaper rashes are normal. To figure things out, these moms often rely on books, internet research, and pure trial and error.

But from this challenging isolation emerges unexpected leadership and expertise. First moms become indispensable guides for friends who later follow in their footsteps.

Becca shares that she's fortunate to have one such experienced mom in her life—a friend who's become both a spiritual and educational mentor. This friend has already navigated the complex landscape of parenting resources and advice, becoming Becca's trusted guide before she even calls the pediatrician.

"She read all the books so we don’t have to," Becca explains gratefully.

Though the initial experience can feel lonely, first-time mothers often become pillars of support for others. They soon turn into the trusted experts on everything from pacifiers and growth spurts to navigating sleep regressions and finding reliable baby products.

As more friends start their own parenting journeys, the "first mom" evolves into the go-to resource, not just for practical advice, but also for emotional support. Knowing someone has navigated these challenges before and is available with empathy and reassurance can make all the difference.

  A mom group socializing with their young childrenCanva

"We wouldn’t survive without you," Becca emphasizes.

Parenting experts suggest that building community is crucial, particularly for those who feel isolated. Online parenting groups, local gatherings, and classes not only share practical advice but also create meaningful connections. Even if you're not the first, chances are you've leaned on someone who was.

  A young mother holds her babyCanva

For those who took the first step into motherhood within their circle, it's never too late to find a community of others who appreciate that particular bravery.

So, if someone in your life was the trailblazing parent in your friend group, take a moment today to thank them. Send a thoughtful message or drop off a small gesture of appreciation. These first moms aren't just the friends who had babies first—they're the ones who made parenting a little easier for everyone who followed.

This article originally appeared last year.