Christmas traditions and festivities are incomplete without meeting your friends and family to spend some memorable time together. Every family has their own unique and fun tradition that they might have willingly or unwillingly followed for ages. A woman named Kaylee from the TikTok account of @poppy_and_kaylee shared the hilarious tradition that is followed in her family where they don't simply exchange gifts, decorate Christmas trees and hang their stocking, but also make special stockings with special "Christmas names."
Image Source: TikTok | @poppy_and_kaylee
She made a viral TikTok video to reveal the origin story of this unique tradition in her family where they get "Christmas Names." Kaylee had previously made a video to simply show her Christmas decorations but one hawkeyed viewer spotted a stocking which had "Brian" sewn on it. Since nobody in Kaylee's family is named Brian, she decided to make another video to answer the curious fellow TikTok user. “These are our Christmas names,” Kaylee said at the beginning. “Doesn’t everyone have Christmas names?”
Representative Image Source: Pexels | Any Lane
She continues to explain the real story behind all of the names. “Who is Dan and Debbie?” she quips. “They were a couple who bought gorgeous Pottery Barn stockings, probably about nine or ten years ago. For some reason, they decided that they didn’t want their stockings, so they returned them to Pottery Barn. And then Pottery Barn sold them to a discount store, for resale.” This is when her family stepped in to provide the twist to the story.
Image Source: TikTok | @poppy_and_kaylee
“Then, a young poor couple who had just had their first baby walked into this discount store and found these gorgeous stockings,” Kaylee recalled. “They only had one child at the time, but they knew they wanted to have three kids one day. So they pre-purchased matching stockings. With the intent that one day they would take out the embroidery and just have them be plain. But the mom of that family never got around to that. And probably never will.”
But these stockings never got fixed and Kaylee has kept them with her since then and every Christmas this inside joke pops out. “It has now just become an inside joke,” she concluded, “that on Christmas morning, We are Dan and Debbie and our children are Kelsey and the Brian twins.” the comment section was full of people who couldn't get enough of this whole naming fiasco during Christmas for Kaylee and her family and the hilarious backstory they shared. So numerous people left their whole comments under the video.
Image Source: TikTok | @downwithmichael
@hobos_hooligans wrote: "My husband & I got a 1st Christmas picture frame ornament. We never put our picture in it so we've been hanging 2 strangers on our tree for 25yrs." @puggle_party_wi joked: "This is wild. I’m Kelsey, my mom is Debbie, my Dad is Brian, my brother is the other Brian…but we don’t have a Dan and also never ordered from PB." @beckyj1610 commented: "We have had an ornament on our family tree since 1992 that says our family with a picture of some random family in it. That’s our Christmas joke."
Image Source: TikTok | @2lmichelle
@cup_53 shared: "I feel like your kids will get married someday and will be flabbergasted that all families don’t have special Christmas names on their stockings!" @litcounselor quipped: "My Christmas name is Eric! My husband's grandma has stockings for everyone and bought a random used one when I joined the family. My name is Amanda." @storytimeslayed added: "I did this. Found one with my husband's name and plucked out all the others intending to get them stiched on later. 7 years later I finally just caved."
Why do some folks use social media but don't engage?
Psychologist says people who never comment on social media share these 5 positive traits
For over 20 years, social media has developed into a staple in many people’s day-to-day lives. Whether it’s to keep in communication with friends and family, following the thoughts of celebrities, or watching cat videos while sipping your morning coffee, there seem to be two types of social media users: commenters and lurkers.
The term “lurker” sounds equally mysterious and insidious, with some social media users writing them off as non-participants at best or voyeurs at worst. However, mindfulness expert Lachlan Brown believes these non-commenters have some very psychologically positive and healthy traits. Let’s take a look at how each one of these traits could be beneficial and see how fruitful lurking might be even though it can drive content creators crazy.
1. Cautious about vulnerability
Consciously or not, making a post online or commenting on one puts you and your words out there. It’s a statement that everyone can see, even if it’s as simple as clicking “like.” Doing so opens yourself up to judgment, with all the good, bad, and potential misinterpretation that comes with it. Non-commenters would rather not open themselves up to that.
These silent users are connected to a concept of self-protection by simply not engaging. By just scrolling past posts or just reading/watching them without commentary, they’re preventing themselves from any downsides of sharing an opinion such as rejection, misunderstanding, or embarrassment. They also have more control on how much of themselves they’re willing to reveal to the general public, and tend to be more open face-to-face or during one-on-one/one-on-few private chats or DMs. This can be seen as a healthy boundary and prevents unnecessary exposure.
Considering many comment sections, especially involving political topics, are meant to stir negative emotional responses to increase engagement, being extra mindful about where, when, and what you comment might not be a bad idea. They might not even take the engagement bait at all. Or if they see a friend of theirs post something vulnerable, they feel more motivated to engage with them personally one-on-one rather than use social media to publicly check in on them.
2. Analytical and reflective mindset
How many times have you gone onto Reddit, YouTube, or any other site and just skimmed past comments that are just different versions of “yes, and,” “no, but,” or “yes, but”? Or the ever insightful, formerly popular comment “First!” in a thread? These silent browsers lean against adding to such noise unless they have some valid and thoughtful contribution (if they bother to comment period).
These non-posters are likely wired on reflective thinking rather than their initial intuition. Not to say that all those who comment aren’t thoughtful, but many tend to react quickly and comment based on their initial feelings rather than absorbing the information, thinking it over, researching or testing their belief, and then posting it. For "lurkers," it could by their very nature to just do all of that and not post it at all, or share their thoughts and findings privately with a friend. All in all, it’s a preference of substance over speed.
3. High sense of self-awareness
Carried over from the first two listed traits, these silent social media users incorporate their concern over their vulnerability and their reflective mindset into digital self-awareness. They know what triggers responses out of them and what causes them to engage in impulsive behavior. It could be that they have engaged with a troll in the past and felt foolish. Or that they just felt sad after a post or got into an unnecessary argument that impacted them offline. By knowing themselves and seeing what’s being discussed, they choose to weigh their words carefully or just not participate at all. It’s a form of self-preservation through restraint.
4. Prefer to observe rather than perform
Some folks treat social media as information, entertainment, or a mix of both, and commenting can feel like they’re yelling at the TV, clapping alone in a movie theater when the credits roll, or yelling “That’s not true!” to a news anchor that will never hear them. But contrary to that, social media is a place where those yells, claps, and accusations can be seen and get a response. By its design, social media is considered by experts and the media as performative, regardless of whether it is positive or negative. Taking all of the previously mentioned traits into account, one can see why they would prefer to “observe the play” rather than get up on the stage of Facebook or X.
On top of that, these non-commenters could be using social media differently than those who choose to fully engage with it. Using this type of navigation, there may be nothing for them to comment about. Some commenters are even vying for this for their mental health. There are articles about how to better curate your social media feeds and manipulate algorithms to create a better social media experience to avoid unnecessary conflict or mentally tiring debate.
If you go on a blocking spree on all of your accounts and just follow the posters that boost you, it could turn your social media into a nice part of your routine as you mainly engage with others face-to-face or privately. In terms of commenting, if your curated Instagram is just following cute dogs and all you have to offer for a comment is “cute dog,” you might just enjoy the picture and then move on with your day rather than join in the noise. These non-commenters aren’t in the show and they’re fine with it.
5. Less motivated by social validation
The last trait that Brown showcases is that social media users who browse without posting tend to be independent from external validation, at least online. Social media is built to grow through feedback loops such as awarding likes, shares, and reposts of your content along with notifications letting you know that a new person follows you or wants to connect. This can lead many people to connect their activity on social media with their sense of self worth, especially with adolescents who are still figuring out their place in the world and have still-developing brains.
Engaging in social media via likes, shares, comments, and posts rewards our brains by having them release dopamine, which makes us feel good and can easily become addictive. For whatever reason, non-commenters don’t rely on social media as a means to gauge their social capital or self worth. This doesn’t make them better than those who do. While some non-commenters could have healthier ways to boost their self worth or release dopamine into their systems, many get that validation from equally unhealthy sources offline. That said, many non-commenters’ silence could be a display of independence and self confidence.
Whether you frequently comment online or don’t, it’s good to understand why you do or don’t. Analyzing your habits can help you determine whether your online engagement is healthy, or needs to be tweaked. With that information, you can then create a healthy social media experience that works for you.