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Women reveal 10 reasons why they choose to remain single

Choosing a partner to grow old with is like a social norm but many women are opting to skip relationships and are focusing on building their lives.

By

Neha B.

By  Neha B.
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Cover Image Source: Left: Pexels – Photo credit: Photo by Keira Burton; Right: Photo by Vlada Karpovich

Choosing to be with someone in a romantic relationship is solely a matter of how one feels about themselves and their life. Choosing a partner just because your parents like them, or just because it would look good to society, would be the wrong way to go ahead. Given all these factors, many women are opting to skip relationships altogether and instead focus on building their lives. In April 2022, Reddit user u/crypticweirdo9105 brought this matter to attention in a post in the r/AskWomen group, asking women why they chose to remain single and how their experience has been. Comments followed from hundreds of women who opened up about their feelings and struggles of being single.

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Andra Furtado
Representative Image Source: Pexels | Andra Furtado

Being single is a struggle, yes even today. Looking at the rising number of powerful women, it might seem that the world has shifted much in terms of its patriarchal thinking. However, deep within the innards of society, the reality remains as bad as it has always been. When a woman chooses to stay single, she is seen as someone undeserving of any love and affection. But these women are constantly defying the odds by prioritizing their own lives over the life of someone who might dictate what they should do and what they shouldn’t. Here is a list of the top ten reasons why women choose to remain single:

1. Dating apps are overwhelming

“I’m “actively” choosing to be single because I don’t want to go on dating apps. I tried them in the past and they were so overwhelming. My anxiety went through the roof trying to juggle conversations and dodging “creepy” messages.” – u/doodlebug365

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly
Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly

2. Bad experience with previous relationships

“I let myself love someone that didn’t love me back the way they should. My life has been ok but really depressing, not feeling like there is something to live for but I know there is I know it will take time.” – u/desperate9832 “Three years ago, my boyfriend and I broke up and it nearly killed me. I took about 6 months to heal and started dating again. The next relationship didn’t work out, and I realized I liked being by myself. I don’t know that I’ll ever remarry or date again. If I do, the standards are really high. I’m very content in my life and in myself and I don’t want to be with someone just for the sake of being with someone.” – u/krlhan11

via GIPHY

3. Haven’t found the perfect match

“I don’t mind being single. It’s not the end of the world. I like my peace and quiet. But I will always be open to having that special someone in my life. I just haven’t found that person yet.” – u/joeymami2015 “I wanted to be whole as a person. I don’t want to depend my happiness on someone else. I don’t want to rush into relationships just for the sake I’m not alone. When I’ve found the person that I want to get vulnerable with; hopefully he will just add up in my life and world.” – u/sakispice “The thing is that I have become very comfortable being with myself, I feel whole. That doesn’t mean that I don’t get lonely. But unless I find someone that will add to my life and make my comfort even more comfortable, I don’t see a point. I never liked the idea of finding a person that completes you, metaphorically speaking princess looking for a prince. I am a queen looking for a king lol.” – u/sparkletempt

Representative Image Source: Pexels | KD Bishop Photography
Representative Image Source: Pexels | KD Bishop Photography

4. Can’t trust men

“I have a lot of relationship and dating trauma I have to work through before I begin the process of ever trusting a man intimately again.” – u/pixelpixxy “The reason is the current state/condition/attitude of men. They want a traditional dynamic but with modern advantages. So they want a subservient woman who will do all the household things and basically be their mom, and still hold down a full time job and be the adult in the relationship. It’s much more peaceful and less frustrating being single.” – u/laminatedbean

via GIPHY

5. Freedom and peace without worry

“Life is peaceful and I don’t get told sweet chocolate-covered lies.” – u/lisavela “I get to focus on myself without the constant worry of not being enough for somebody or being too much. peaceful.” – u/lace_coffin

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly
Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly

6. Focused on career goals

“I was in an abusive relationship for 19 years. It did much damage that I’m trying to heal from but more than anything, it held me back from achieving my professional goals. Now that I’m free, I’m focused on my goals and I won’t be distracted until I’m done.” – u/infactinfarctinfart

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Moose Photos
Representative Image Source: Pexels | Moose Photos

7. Independence is too sweet to share 

“I never consciously made that decision – I’m just too selfish to be willing to adapt to being in that kind of relationship.” – u/mindingmine “It’s worth it to be on my own because I am finally giving my love to the one person that deserves it the most: me.” – u/crochetandkittens

via GIPHY

8. Self-love is a priority

“Since I decided to be single I have achieved so many goals, my career has launched and I bought my first house on my own! From now on I am very careful about who I allow in my life, I don’t settle for less because I don’t need to. Being emotionally and financially independent is the most important thing in life, for women and men. Partnerships are important but taking care of yourself first should always be a priority.” – u/immediate_expert6742

Representative Image Source: Pexels | NGQAH 83
Representative Image Source: Pexels | NGQAH 83

9. Relationships are messy and superficial

“Relationships seem to be so superficial now, no deep connection and love anymore.” – u/bluedelights “The idea of a relationship still feels like giving someone control over my life. And I can’t do that. Plus, I’ve been having fun just doing what I want, and participating in the hook-up scene.” – u/clutterc0re

via GIPHY

10. Life is great without anyone

“I’d like to know if I have a reason that I just haven’t discovered yet. To me, I just don’t feel any desire to seek anyone out. No feelings or fear of loneliness giving that push I guess. Life is great. I see my friends when I do crave some interaction. Having my dog around is always joyful too.” – u/important_coconut_39 “I’m just a lot happier this way in general. I’ve noticed I’m a lot more creative when I’m not in a relationship and I find it fun.” – u/bigbootyomoletlover  “I truly enjoy my single life!” – u/meskeptical

Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly
Representative Image Source: Pexels | Olly

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  • A 6-year-old girl thought skateboarding was just for boys. One stranger at the skate park spent an hour proving her wrong.
    A young skater performs a trick – Photo credit: Canva
    , , , ,

    A 6-year-old girl thought skateboarding was just for boys. One stranger at the skate park spent an hour proving her wrong.

    ​A mom braced for the worst when a teenage boy skated toward her daughter.

    Adam Albright-Hanna

    According to data tracked by the Duke of Edinburgh’s Award program, the number of young women and girls who identify skateboarding as their chosen activity rose 800% between 2017 and 2022. At the international competition level, according to a peer-reviewed study published in early 2025, the number of female competitors has quadrupled since 2016. Right now, the best skaters on the competitive circuit are teenage girls, some as young as 15.

    None of that was true yet when Jeanean Thomas (@JeaneanThomas) took her 6-year-old daughter Peyton to a skate park in Cambridge, Ontario, in October of 2015. But the moment that happened that afternoon has been quietly circulating the internet ever since, and it keeps finding new audiences because the thing it’s really about hasn’t changed at all.

    Thomas, a firefighter, had spent months convincing Peyton that skateboarding wasn’t just for boys. “She’d only ever seen boys skateboard so she just assumed that it was a boy sport,” Thomas told Today. When they finally arrived at the park, her resolve nearly broke. It was full of teenage boys, smoking and swearing. Peyton wanted to turn around immediately.

    Thomas did too, if she’s being honest. “I secretly wanted to go too,” she later wrote, “because I didn’t want to have to put on my mom voice and exchange words with you. I also didn’t want my daughter to feel like she had to be scared of anyone, or that she wasn’t entitled to that skate park just as much as you were.”

    So they stayed. Peyton slipped onto the board and started falling. And then one of the boys skated over.

    “I heard you say, ‘Your feet are all wrong. Can I help you?’” Thomas wrote in a letter she posted to X that night, addressed to the teenager she never got to thank in person. “You proceeded to spend almost an hour with my daughter showing her how to balance and steer and she listened to you. I even heard you tell her to stay away from the rails so that she wouldn’t get hurt.”

    skate park kindness viral story, girls skateboarding, Jeanean Thomas skate park letter, Ryan Carney Cambridge Ontario, teenage boy helps girl skate, female skateboarders rising, skateboarding gender stereotypes, heartwarming parenting story, kids and kindness, breaking gender stereotypes skateboarding
    A young woman on roller skates flies off the ramp. Photo Credit: Canva

    His friends made fun of him for it. He kept going anyway.

    “I want you to know that I am proud that you are part of my community and I want to thank you for being kind to my daughter,” Thomas wrote. “She left with a sense of pride and with the confidence that she can do anything, because of you.”

    The letter went viral almost immediately. It later emerged, through reporting by the Cambridge Times, that the young man wasn’t a teenager at all. His name was Ryan Carney, a 20-year-old skate coach who worked at an indoor park in nearby Kitchener. He was baffled by the attention. “If I didn’t know what the heck I was doing, and I was in a place that could be intimidating at that age, I’d want someone to help me,” he told CBC News. “That’s all I did.”

    When they left the park, Peyton had gone from slipping off the board entirely to riding up and down ramps. She asked to go back every day after that.

    The culture Peyton stepped into that afternoon was one that had actively excluded girls for decades. What Carney did, without thinking much of it, was exactly the kind of thing that changes a kid’s relationship to a sport before she’s old enough to know she was supposed to be excluded from it. The 800% participation increase didn’t come from nowhere. It came from moments like this one, scaled up, repeated, normalized.

    “I just seen a little girl struggling to enjoy her time there,” Carney said. “I wanted to see her leaving wanting to skateboard again.”

    She did.

    This article originally appeared last year. 

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  • Neuroscientist reveals the 3 dead giveaways someone is pretending to be smarter than they really are
    Are they full of it or not? – Photo credit: Canva

    Neuroscientist reveals the 3 dead giveaways someone is pretending to be smarter than they really are

    And one way to have a great intellectual conversation that doesn’t turn into a fight.

    Erik Barnes

    Getting information through quality conversation can be enjoyable or a struggle. Figuring out solutions and fielding valuable expert opinions can be difficult to discern when the person you’re talking to (or debating with) seems suspect. Fortunately, a neuroscientist online has laid out what to look out for to see if your conversation partner is actually intellectual or just talking out of their…well, you know.

    Neuroscientist turned musician/comedian Alex Riordan discussed how to spot pseudo-intellectuals and how they differentiate themselves from actual intellectuals. For Riordan, who spends ample time with his colleagues at Princeton University as well as his degree-less intellectual friends (because you don’t need to go to college to be intelligent), he’s identified three signs that helped him separate the fake-it-til-you-make-its from actually thoughtful individuals.

    https://www.tiktok.com/@alex_riordan_/video/7163445028688301354

    Pseudo-intellectuals will talk past you

    Riordan mentions that pseudo-intellectuals will often go out of their way to use colorful rhetoric and terms to try to talk past you and get you to talk past them. To expand on Riordan’s point, the purpose is a means to bait you into an argument by cutting you off before fully explaining your point or trying to move the conversation past your points to focus in on their own point. They may use tactics such as whataboutism, a tactic that asks, “But what about ______?” to shift the focus of the conversation from one issue to another in order to distract or deflect from initial point.

    They aim to ‘win,’ not aim to understand

    The folks that aim to appear smarter than they truly are don’t have any interest in coming to an understanding with their conversation. They want to win. This is common in what Riordan calls “debate bro tactics.”. Being right isn’t as important as appearing right, regardless of any logical holes or pushback that they cannot rationally defend.

    @melissa162620

    #MemeCut #brother #sister #debates #? #Meme #MemeCut

    ♬ original sound – I Green Screen Things

    The Dunning-Kruger effect

    Riordan briefly mentions the Dunning-Kruger effect as a way to spot if someone is talking nonsense. The Dunning-Kruger effect is a cognitive bias in which people overestimate their knowledge and/or abilities in a specific area. When they encounter a new subject, they immediately think they have a complete grasp of it and lack the self awareness to see their own limitations. Once they read an article by an actual expert that conflicts with their understanding, they reject it and assume they’re right despite their lack of education, skills, or actual knowledge.

    @aliabdaal

    Why smart people think they’re not smart ? The Dunning-Kruger effect is real. The more you know, the more you realise how much you don’t know – and it can make you feel like you’re falling behind, even when you’re not. Meanwhile, those with less knowledge often feel more confident because they’re unaware of what they’re missing. Classic case of small fish, big pond vs big fish, tiny puddle ? Ever felt this way? Let me know in the comments ?

    ♬ original sound – Ali Abdaal – Ali Abdaal

    If a person in a conversation demonstrates those behaviors, you may want to politely shut it down. However, even if with a person who knows what they’re talking about, conversations can get heated and people can devolve into these pseudo-intellectual behaviors. Fortunately, Riordan shared one great way he and his colleagues keep the conversation focused on understanding and respect.

    Ask clarifying questions

    Asking clarifying questions is a habit Riordan and his colleagues and friends practice to curb any pseudo-intellectualism and arguments that might arise from it. They do so because asking for clarification goes against all of the previously mentioned tactics of fake know-it-alls. It doesn’t claim to know everything, it’s aimed for understanding rather than “winning,” and acknowledges that you may not know everything about the subject at hand.

    Asking clarifying questions, especially the right ones, shows your conversation partner that you’re curious about them and their thoughts, which encourages them to feel more connected with you. If you disagree with a person’s point and respond with a clarifying question it allows you to see where they’re coming from, find common ground, or learn something you hadn’t considered before. In some cases, answering clarifying questions helps your conversation partner to notice errors or discrepancies in their own thinking that may change their conclusions to line up with yours.

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    – What did you mean about ____?

    – Could you further elaborate on that?

    – I heard you say ____, am I interpreting that correctly?

    – Are there specifics about ____?

    – Can you break that down into detail for me?

    Whether you’re conversing about politics, the universe, or what the best pizza topping is, leading with curiosity can ensure that everyone is not only enjoying the conversation, but are learning legitimate truths as well.

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  • Therapist explains ‘Admin Nights’ hack for turning tedious ‘to do’ lists into a brilliant game night
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    Therapist explains ‘Admin Nights’ hack for turning tedious ‘to do’ lists into a brilliant game night

    This actually works.

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    Admin Nights have other benefits aside from making digital decluttering more enjoyable, such as forging closer bonds with your friends.

    “I love this trend because most of us wish we had more time to spend with friends, so turning administrative tasks into an opportunity to do something we long to do is a great life hack,” licensed therapist Anindita Bhaumik tells GOOD. “An admin night is a great idea for a low-cost friend hang. You can catch up with each other while checking tasks off your list.”

    “It will likely spur on important updates that friends might not get around to sharing, such as the health concerns behind the appointment they’re making, how work is going, or how they’re doing financially. This can be an organic way to practice authenticity with one another and support each other,” Bhaumik added.

    @nvmoss

    When admin night makes it out the group chat ? ✨

    ♬ frank christmas – cam

    With the understanding you’ll need to establish some ground rules to stay on task, Admin Nights could make you more efficient in your mundane administrative tasks. Bhaumik and others state that Admin Nights are a form of “body doubling” which could ensure that you get everything done with more focus. Body doubling is a psychological hack in which most people tend to stay on task when someone else is in the same room as them, even if they don’t interact with one another. It’s partially why many work offices have open floor plans.

    “The beautiful thing about body doubling is it works both ways,” said Bhaumik. “One person isn’t responsible for the other; rather, both (or the group) benefit from working on tasks together. This can even be accomplished virtually, by holding admin nights on a video call, for example.”

    @nicolecappetta

    monthly admin date NEW YEAR edition ✨ using my NEW Admin Date Planner ✨ we set goals for the year and a support structure to help us reach those goals. 2026 is gonna be a good year ! also bagels are from Sincerely Bagel which is the best bagel I’ve had in PDX to date. I get the kimchi cheddar with scallion cream cheese ? . . . #TikTokCreatorSearchInsightsIncentive

    ♬ EVERLASTING LOVE – GROWS

    If you want to try to host a successful Admin Night, it’s fortunately pretty simple. Shoot out texts or emails to friends you think would like this concept, figure out a date, go simple with snacks or ordering a pizza, and make sure your home has plenty of couches, blankets, etc. to keep the vibe comfy. Depending on your friend group and how they work, you may want to investigate various “Chill Music to Study To” playlists to have on while you all concentrate on your tasks.

    Admin Nights could just change the game and turn boring or anxiety-ridden work into the most fun and relaxing day of your week.

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