A supermom from 1958 caressed her boy’s hair with her foot. She embroidered clothes with her foot and then spent some relaxing moments sipping a cup of coffee, that too, with her foot. What most people do with their hands, Phyllis Lumley did with her feet. Even though she did not have arms, she would find a way around every difficulty. She relied on her supple feet to raise a happy family of seven children.
Representative Image Source: Pexels | RDNE Stock project
Phyllis Lumley was one of the most exceptional mothers in Britain. She overcame limitations and did all her work with her feet, not leaving any stone unturned to give her best. British Universities Film & Video Council called her the “Mother in a Million.” She resided in her six-roomed house in Battersea, London.
The remarkable story of Lumley recently surfaced on social media when a post on X by @historyinmemes featuring her attracted 17 million views. People expressed their reverence for the brave lady who seemed to perform even hard tasks with ease. The post’s caption read, “The super mom of 1958.”
“Raised 7 kids without arms. Any excuses you might have in life seem petty now,” commented @kingcecrops. @pawanyadav8 said, “She was really a super mom. Even after being disabled, she did all that was needed for her kids, she even put the thread in the needle which most can’t even put using their hands.”
Many people shared inspirational insights that the video of the supermom prompted inside them. @ruthdavoice wrote, “We can all agree that the only limitation is our mind. Anything is possible.” @gilliroth said, “Moms do what moms have to do.”
Disability isn't inability
— Bett🇰🇪 (@kimtaaaii) May 13, 2024
In a light-hearted tone, @erickysonw said, “The Super Mom of 1958 must have had a cape hidden under her apron!” Whereas, @theoriginaljn proclaimed, “No disability can stop a super mom from being a super mom.”
The inspiring story of Lumley was also covered in a 1954 edition of a magazine. Snippets of this feature are available to read in the archives of the National Library of Australia. Speaking to the magazine, Lumley recalled a few moments of anxiety and fear she experienced when she was about to welcome her first baby. “Strangely,” she said, “they were just the usual fears and anxieties that every mother goes through the first time. I never once had a thought that the child might be born like myself—deformed.”
She described that she was often ostracized in her community. Old-fashioned mothers wouldn’t come close to her during their pregnancy believing that it would curse their babies and pass on her disability to their bodies. But when the time came for her first pregnancy, she found that the doctors and nurses treated her very much like other, normal mothers. “Right after the baby was born, I’m afraid I did ask whether she was all right. Then they brought her to me and it was the most wonderful moment in my whole life,” she recollected.
Using her feet, she worked in the kitchen, served her baby meals and ironed her baby’s clothes. To her utter happiness, all of her seven babies were born without deformity. She was married to a glazier, John Lumley. The couple had initially decided that one child would be good enough for them. But by the time Mrs. Lumley mastered the knack of dressing, undressing, feeding, and caring for her baby Marie, she could hardly wait for the next one.
Lumley said that her husband didn’t care about her disability and rather buttressed her with love, and fierce protection. She had declared that there was no need for anyone to consider her anything but a fortunate woman.
As per Big Red Book, the story of Lumley was also depicted by Eamonn Andrews in a 1963 episode of the BBC program “This is Your Life.”
Ultrasound of human baby.Image via 
IVF animated process.Image via 
A couple speaks with a fertility professional.Image via 
Love, Mom.Photo from Heidi Johnson 
A teen boy having a hard time. 
Hands hold a digital representation of the brain.Image via 
Mother and daughter work a puzzle.Image via 
Man and woman connect under the sunshine.Image via 
The obituary paints a comic, if bleak, picture. 
A Facebook post about the obituary.
Why do some folks use social media but don't engage?
Psychologist says people who never comment on social media share these 5 positive traits
For over 20 years, social media has developed into a staple in many people’s day-to-day lives. Whether it’s to keep in communication with friends and family, following the thoughts of celebrities, or watching cat videos while sipping your morning coffee, there seem to be two types of social media users: commenters and lurkers.
The term “lurker” sounds equally mysterious and insidious, with some social media users writing them off as non-participants at best or voyeurs at worst. However, mindfulness expert Lachlan Brown believes these non-commenters have some very psychologically positive and healthy traits. Let’s take a look at how each one of these traits could be beneficial and see how fruitful lurking might be even though it can drive content creators crazy.
1. Cautious about vulnerability
Consciously or not, making a post online or commenting on one puts you and your words out there. It’s a statement that everyone can see, even if it’s as simple as clicking “like.” Doing so opens yourself up to judgment, with all the good, bad, and potential misinterpretation that comes with it. Non-commenters would rather not open themselves up to that.
These silent users are connected to a concept of self-protection by simply not engaging. By just scrolling past posts or just reading/watching them without commentary, they’re preventing themselves from any downsides of sharing an opinion such as rejection, misunderstanding, or embarrassment. They also have more control on how much of themselves they’re willing to reveal to the general public, and tend to be more open face-to-face or during one-on-one/one-on-few private chats or DMs. This can be seen as a healthy boundary and prevents unnecessary exposure.
Considering many comment sections, especially involving political topics, are meant to stir negative emotional responses to increase engagement, being extra mindful about where, when, and what you comment might not be a bad idea. They might not even take the engagement bait at all. Or if they see a friend of theirs post something vulnerable, they feel more motivated to engage with them personally one-on-one rather than use social media to publicly check in on them.
2. Analytical and reflective mindset
How many times have you gone onto Reddit, YouTube, or any other site and just skimmed past comments that are just different versions of “yes, and,” “no, but,” or “yes, but”? Or the ever insightful, formerly popular comment “First!” in a thread? These silent browsers lean against adding to such noise unless they have some valid and thoughtful contribution (if they bother to comment period).
These non-posters are likely wired on reflective thinking rather than their initial intuition. Not to say that all those who comment aren’t thoughtful, but many tend to react quickly and comment based on their initial feelings rather than absorbing the information, thinking it over, researching or testing their belief, and then posting it. For "lurkers," it could by their very nature to just do all of that and not post it at all, or share their thoughts and findings privately with a friend. All in all, it’s a preference of substance over speed.
3. High sense of self-awareness
Carried over from the first two listed traits, these silent social media users incorporate their concern over their vulnerability and their reflective mindset into digital self-awareness. They know what triggers responses out of them and what causes them to engage in impulsive behavior. It could be that they have engaged with a troll in the past and felt foolish. Or that they just felt sad after a post or got into an unnecessary argument that impacted them offline. By knowing themselves and seeing what’s being discussed, they choose to weigh their words carefully or just not participate at all. It’s a form of self-preservation through restraint.
4. Prefer to observe rather than perform
Some folks treat social media as information, entertainment, or a mix of both, and commenting can feel like they’re yelling at the TV, clapping alone in a movie theater when the credits roll, or yelling “That’s not true!” to a news anchor that will never hear them. But contrary to that, social media is a place where those yells, claps, and accusations can be seen and get a response. By its design, social media is considered by experts and the media as performative, regardless of whether it is positive or negative. Taking all of the previously mentioned traits into account, one can see why they would prefer to “observe the play” rather than get up on the stage of Facebook or X.
On top of that, these non-commenters could be using social media differently than those who choose to fully engage with it. Using this type of navigation, there may be nothing for them to comment about. Some commenters are even vying for this for their mental health. There are articles about how to better curate your social media feeds and manipulate algorithms to create a better social media experience to avoid unnecessary conflict or mentally tiring debate.
If you go on a blocking spree on all of your accounts and just follow the posters that boost you, it could turn your social media into a nice part of your routine as you mainly engage with others face-to-face or privately. In terms of commenting, if your curated Instagram is just following cute dogs and all you have to offer for a comment is “cute dog,” you might just enjoy the picture and then move on with your day rather than join in the noise. These non-commenters aren’t in the show and they’re fine with it.
5. Less motivated by social validation
The last trait that Brown showcases is that social media users who browse without posting tend to be independent from external validation, at least online. Social media is built to grow through feedback loops such as awarding likes, shares, and reposts of your content along with notifications letting you know that a new person follows you or wants to connect. This can lead many people to connect their activity on social media with their sense of self worth, especially with adolescents who are still figuring out their place in the world and have still-developing brains.
Engaging in social media via likes, shares, comments, and posts rewards our brains by having them release dopamine, which makes us feel good and can easily become addictive. For whatever reason, non-commenters don’t rely on social media as a means to gauge their social capital or self worth. This doesn’t make them better than those who do. While some non-commenters could have healthier ways to boost their self worth or release dopamine into their systems, many get that validation from equally unhealthy sources offline. That said, many non-commenters’ silence could be a display of independence and self confidence.
Whether you frequently comment online or don’t, it’s good to understand why you do or don’t. Analyzing your habits can help you determine whether your online engagement is healthy, or needs to be tweaked. With that information, you can then create a healthy social media experience that works for you.